My Horrible Boss

[Dr.Midnight]

It usually isn't my style to discuss how I'm feeling about something, but rarely do I have an issue like this. At the beginning of the year, a new branch manager took over where I work. In the first couple of months, I heard nothing good about this guy. Me being level headed, I dismissed this talk and waiting to form an opinion for myself. After working with this dude for a month, I knew very quickly that for once the work place gossip was right. This is the biggest jerk I have ever worked for in my life.

Have you ever worked for someone that when you cross paths in the building they don't say anything to you? Not, "Good Morning" or "How are You Doing?" or anything. They just stare at you as you walk by. Never once has he cared enough to ask anything personal of me. He doesn't care if I'm married, have kids or what I like to do for fun. In fact, he barely speaks to me at all. Usually all I get are nasty emails from him. Some of the guys I work with said he's not even bothered introducing himself at all to them, and this new guy has been around since January. I've also never heard a positive thing come out of his mouth. He's never said, "Thank You" or "Good Job". He always focuses on the negative. What's more, I don't think he's completely stupid, but he's so arrogant that he feels like any decision he makes will be correct. He institutes a policy or new procedure and gets no input from anyone. In my opinion, he's made some mistakes that have impacted everyone negatively.

As bad as he is, I could work with him, but now, he's doing things that are affecting my financial future. That's something I can't deal with. I'm going to go through channels and address my concerns, but this guy is so arrogant it won't do any good. As much as I hate to do this it's time to abandon ship. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest INGO.

 

[spec4]

How is his operation going? If he isn't doing well he may be booted out by higher management. Absent that, chances are he won't change and things will go from bad to worse. (Believe me, I've seen it) Therefore, you need to examine your options. Avoid commiserating with your co-workers, take care of yourself.

 

[Principal Skinr]

I knew a school superintendent once who complained that she hated it when walking down a hallway in the middle of thought, and people walking by saying hello would expect her to respond and to smile. She said she'd just look at the ground and walk on by. To say my jaw was on the ground upon hearing this, would be an understatement. Consequently, she never lasted more than 2 years anywhere as superintendent, from what I know. The real kicker was that I knew her as a professor teaching in my Masters program for Educational Leadership. What course did she teach? Communication. Unbelievable. We did learn from her...about what NOT to do.

The key is that you described this person as a "boss", and that's exactly what he sounds like, and nothing more. All one needs to be a boss is title and authority. To be a leader is something entirely different, and strong leaders are not common. My favorite definition of a leader is as follows, and unfortunately, I don't know who said it. A leader is someone who others will follow to a place they would never go alone. To do that, a leader must not just lead by example, but must be encouraging to people and must create a positive culture. Culture drives every good thing in an organization, and it does start with the leader. He or she sets the tone and the organization comes to reflect him or her, in its values and attitude. I've seen that happen with every great leader for whom I've worked.

You've got a positive attitude in terms of knowing you can work with him, or, it sounds like, just about anyone. I hope things turn around for you and anyone else who may be negatively affected by this boss.

 

[bmbutch]

Sorry about the work/boss issues, amazing how the wrong promotion/transfer can jack up a previously great job.

No real advice, just condolences, praying it turns around for you!

 

[cook4army]

I'm sorry that you're dealing with this kind of person at work, for I may not have an arrogant person as my supervisor, mine, IMO, is simply a poor leader..

Im not saying poor leader as an opinion, im stating as fact. The supervisors I have in place over me, couldn't lead a battalion of tanks through the side of a wet paper bag, with artillery and air support.....sheer incompetence is the best description I can use.

But, I have a solution to my issue that you may not, so my advice to you is think about your options, and make the best plan you can. Either his guy will hang himself with the rope y'all have given him, or a better employment scenario will arise to replace the one your in. If enough people start turning their notices in, it may (and I emphasized MAY) cause upper management above him to inquire why everyone is jumping ship.

Good luck!!

 

[AllenM]

had to click on the link to see if it was about me. Whew
Poor people and management skills to be certain, I would try to talk to him first before going over his head, although like you said probably not going to do any good, it sounds like a long term issue. If you have been with the company a long time your voice should matter to his superiors.
Good luck.

 

[Principal Skinr]

had to click on the link to see if it was about me. Whew
Poor people and management skills to be certain, I would try to talk to him first before going over his head, although like you said probably not going to do any good, it sounds like a long term issue. If you have been with the company a long time your voice should matter to his superiors.
Good luck.

Slightly OT, but Allen, my admiration for you as a leader just keeps growing, as I've come across bits of your wisdom here and there. Your humility is evident all around you and is a sign that you truly know how it is done.

 

[Dr.Midnight]

Guys, thanks for the well thought out and insightful replies. I've worked for this place for four years, and I have always tried to do the best I could and take personal ownership of my job. That's why I'm struggling with my situation so much. My company's management is screwed up from the top down. I've always known that, but up until recently, I had an awesome boss that filtered all the nonsense out. Now he's moved on and there's nothing protecting all the employees from the idiocy. Back to my jackass manager, he's been with the company a long time. The only reason I can see he's in his position is because his supervisors are so detached and out of tune with what's going on that he's been able to move through the ranks. It's so screwed up where I'm at, if I can't find something else soon, I'm just going to quit and wait a year until my non compete agreement expires and go work for the competition. It sucks hating your job so bad that on Sunday morning you're sick over the thought of going back to work on Monday.

 

[CountryBoy19]

How is his operation going? If he isn't doing well he may be booted out by higher management. Absent that, chances are he won't change and things will go from bad to worse. (Believe me, I've seen it) Therefore, you need to examine your options. Avoid commiserating with your co-workers, take care of yourself.

Haha, if the OP works for who I think he works for that will NEVER happen. If he is a problematic individual he will be promoted to an even higher position where he doesn't interact with people that he can be a problem to...

 

[GodFearinGunTotin]

Guys, thanks for the well thought out and insightful replies. I've worked for this place for four years, and I have always tried to do the best I could and take personal ownership of my job. That's why I'm struggling with my situation so much. My company's management is screwed up from the top down. I've always known that, but up until recently, I had an awesome boss that filtered all the nonsense out. Now he's moved on and there's nothing protecting all the employees from the idiocy. Back to my jackass manager, he's been with the company a long time. The only reason I can see he's in his position is because his supervisors are so detached and out of tune with what's going on that he's been able to move through the ranks. It's so screwed up where I'm at, if I can't find something else soon, I'm just going to quit and wait a year until my non compete agreement expires and go work for the competition. It sucks hating your job so bad that on Sunday morning you're sick over the thought of going back to work on Monday.

Dude, I've been there (several times). I was going to suggest just sucking it up and waiting it out. But from this post, I'm not so sure the situation will improve if/when this boss moves on. I've had some good bosses, some bad, and some you just wanted to kill. The good thing is, the bad ones usually moved on pretty quickly--unfortunately one or two of them came back promoted several steps . It was always such a relief when a bad one moved on.

It seems to me companies develop a certain culture; sometimes certain departments or plants/branch offices even develop their own. And the people they tend to promote and lead tend to fit into that company's cultural mold. If you cannot adapt to, cope with, or at least tolerate to that culture, it will make your life miserable. I know exactly what you're talking about dreading Monday so much, you're Sundays are not enjoyable. Life is too short to spend half of your waking hours in a place that makes you miserable.

 

[Dr.Midnight]

Dude, I've been there (several times). I was going to suggest just sucking it up and waiting it out. But from this post, I'm not so sure the situation will improve if/when this boss moves on. I've had some good bosses, some bad, and some you just wanted to kill. The good thing is, the bad ones usually moved on pretty quickly--unfortunately one or two of them came back promoted several steps . It was always such a relief when a bad one moved on.

It seems to me companies develop a certain culture; sometimes certain departments or plants/branch offices even develop their own. And the people they tend to promote and lead tend to fit into that company's cultural mold. If you cannot adapt to, cope with, or at least tolerate to that culture, it will make your life miserable. I know exactly what you're talking about dreading Monday so much, you're Sundays are not enjoyable. Life is too short to spend half of your waking hours in a place that makes you miserable.

Thanks for that. As you know, I've been thinking about this all weekend. I have come to the conclusion that it needs to be me that makes a quick exit. My boss has been with the company so long that either upper management loves his bottom line no matter how he gets there, or is so clueless about what is going on its unbelievable. In either case he's probably not going anywhere, so the guy with less than five years under his belt isn't going to get the benefit of the doubt.

You know, I've never been so arrogant as to think I'm irreplaceable, but if someone with my same qualifications submitted a resume to my present company, they would probably go out of their way to bring them on board. Why my current boss acts like he doesn't care if I stay, go or die is a mystery to me. From what I can see, it's not just me he has that attitude towards, but the entire workforce.

 

[bigcraig]

I have been in your position, I toughed it out a year.

Then, I quit and took all my accounts with me. (There is no such thing as a no compete clause in my line of work.)

Good Luck.

 

[spec4]

Now that you decided a course, you surely must feel better. Good luck and stay on the high road.

 

[Dirtebiker]

It usually isn't my style to discuss how I'm feeling about something, but rarely do I have an issue like this. At the beginning of the year, a new branch manager took over where I work. In the first couple of months, I heard nothing good about this guy. Me being level headed, I dismissed this talk and waiting to form an opinion for myself. After working with this dude for a month, I knew very quickly that for once the work place gossip was right. This is the biggest jerk I have ever worked for in my life.

Have you ever worked for someone that when you cross paths in the building they don't say anything to you? Not, "Good Morning" or "How are You Doing?" or anything. They just stare at you as you walk by. Never once has he cared enough to ask anything personal of me. He doesn't care if I'm married, have kids or what I like to do for fun. In fact, he barely speaks to me at all. Usually all I get are nasty emails from him. Some of the guys I work with said he's not even bothered introducing himself at all to them, and this new guy has been around since January. I've also never heard a positive thing come out of his mouth. He's never said, "Thank You" or "Good Job". He always focuses on the negative. What's more, I don't think he's completely stupid, but he's so arrogant that he feels like any decision he makes will be correct. He institutes a policy or new procedure and gets no input from anyone. In my opinion, he's made some mistakes that have impacted everyone negatively.

As bad as he is, I could work with him, but now, he's doing things that are affecting my financial future. That's something I can't deal with. I'm going to go through channels and address my concerns, but this guy is so arrogant it won't do any good. As much as I hate to do this it's time to abandon ship. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest INGO.

It's a two way street. Do you say good morning to him? Do you ask about HIS family? Do you ever tell him "good job"?

 

[OakRiver]

My company's management is screwed up from the top down. I've always known that, but up until recently, I had an awesome boss that filtered all the nonsense out. Now he's moved on and there's nothing protecting all the employees from the idiocy. Back to my jackass manager, he's been with the company a long time.

Just to focus on this point, I think moving on is the absolute right thing to do. This new manager you are experiencing difficulties with is not the problem, he is a symptom of the problem. If higher management is cut from the same cloth as this manager then trying to seek redress could be cause more problems than it solves, if he gets wind of your complaint he could make your life miserable while you are there. Worst case be blackballs you to future employers

 

[chef larry]

I knew a school superintendent once who complained that she hated it when walking down a hallway in the middle of thought, and people walking by saying hello would expect her to respond and to smile. She said she'd just look at the ground and walk on by. To say my jaw was on the ground upon hearing this, would be an understatement. Consequently, she never lasted more than 2 years anywhere as superintendent, from what I know. The real kicker was that I knew her as a professor teaching in my Masters program for Educational Leadership. What course did she teach? Communication. Unbelievable. We did learn from her...about what NOT to do.

The key is that you described this person as a "boss", and that's exactly what he sounds like, and nothing more. All one needs to be a boss is title and authority. To be a leader is something entirely different, and strong leaders are not common. My favorite definition of a leader is as follows, and unfortunately, I don't know who said it. A leader is someone who others will follow to a place they would never go alone. To do that, a leader must not just lead by example, but must be encouraging to people and must create a positive culture. Culture drives every good thing in an organization, and it does start with the leader. He or she sets the tone and the organization comes to reflect him or her, in its values and attitude. I've seen that happen with every great leader for whom I've worked.

You've got a positive attitude in terms of knowing you can work with him, or, it sounds like, just about anyone. I hope things turn around for you and anyone else who may be negatively affected by this boss.

I like your quote of what a leader is.

 

[Dr.Midnight]

It's a two way street. Do you say good morning to him? Do you ask about HIS family? Do you ever tell him "good job"?

In his first month, I tried to initiate a conversation several times. He simply had no interest in any dialogue with me. As far as me telling him "Good Job", I'll do that when he makes a decision that doesn't impact me negatively.

When I was in management years ago, I didn't think it was the team members job to make me feel comfortable and at ease. I always thought it was my job to reach out and support them.

 

[Twangbanger]

Guys, thanks for the well thought out and insightful replies. I've worked for this place for four years, and I have always tried to do the best I could and take personal ownership of my job. That's why I'm struggling with my situation so much. My company's management is screwed up from the top down. I've always known that, but up until recently, I had an awesome boss that filtered all the nonsense out. Now he's moved on and there's nothing protecting all the employees from the idiocy. Back to my jackass manager, he's been with the company a long time. The only reason I can see he's in his position is because his supervisors are so detached and out of tune with what's going on that he's been able to move through the ranks. It's so screwed up where I'm at, if I can't find something else soon, I'm just going to quit and wait a year until my non compete agreement expires and go work for the competition. It sucks hating your job so bad that on Sunday morning you're sick over the thought of going back to work on Monday.

I think the most telling detail in your story, is the fact that the manager in question has been with the company a long time. That right there tells me a lot about how to handle this. Companies often move a manager into an area _not_ because he's the best talent for that area, but rather because having him in that place, at that particular time, solves some kind of personnel issue for the company. In fact, they may be putting him there _because_ he's an a-hole, and they needed to get him away from somebody else, but he's been there so long they don't feel they can fire him. There are plenty of reasons for "parking" a manager in a certain location which have nothing to do with ability. If he's negatively affecting your future, your skills are marketable elsewhere, and you know this company won't change and you can't "wait him out," it's probably better to leave like you've made the decision to do.

And this is just my opinion, but be careful about burning bridges - keep the exit interview short and vague. In my opinion, the purpose of the exit interview is to determine if an outgoing employee is planning to sue the company, and otherwise, it's just something they stick in your file before sending it to long-term storage. In my experience, no action ever gets taken based on what is said in them (they've just lost one employee it will require effort and money to replace - the last thing that HR person wants to do is touch off a controversy that results in losing yet another one who still works there). Others would argue that if the boss is an a-hole, then the company needs to know this information. My opinion is: the company probably already knows this person is an a-hole and does not care, or they wouldn't have put him there. As long as your reason for leaving doesn't rise to the level of criminal activity or a lawsuit, better just to keep it short, vague, and professional. You might just mention there was a "chemistry issue" with your supervisor and leave it at that. If you ever want to go back and work there again someday, after the present boss is gone, this will help explain why you left (and if he's been putting negative things in your personnel file, it might help cancel that out somewhat). But there is absolutely nothing to gain from extensively airing out personal issues in the exit interview, and everything to lose. It will just make you look bad to a future HR person who might be thinking about hiring you back.

Bottom line - "Personal chemistry" issues are rampant in any company that employs people, and companies really don't care about them, nor think they can do anything about it.

I empathize with what you're going through, and good luck with your decision.

 

[ModernGunner]

You'll find the Peter Principle in evidence in management perhaps more than anywhere else in business.

About 80% of people in management have no concept of what good management is, what good management takes, and what good management is supposed to accomplish.

Many, many, many 'bosses' believe the concept is to 'boss' people. That's absolutely wrong.

It's unfortunate, because it ALSO means whomever put that manager in the position ALSO have no concept of what they're doing. Which means that manager, and whomever hired them are, at best, mediocre. Regardless of whatever financial success they may have. However much that is, it's only a fraction of what they COULD make, if they were fully competent.

Best of luck in your current situation, OP. Personally, I don't work for bad bosses.

 

[Dr.Midnight]

Again, I'm amazed at the heart-felt and genuine nature of all the posts here. I went for a long motorcycle ride today and work was on my mind the entire time. It's no fun when you're so miserable that your job is basically eating away at you a little at a time. I haven't mentioned this before, but it gets discouraging for me at times. I've had jobs that have paid well for all my life, but they weren't jobs that I enjoyed, at least for very long. For whatever reason, I just haven't been able to find "the one". I really thought by this point in my life I would be settled into a great place and could focus on my retirement versus what I would be doing next month. I'll just keep my head up for now and try and find a better situation.