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  1. #21
    Master spec4's Avatar

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    It's a job that takes work. We have all of our financial assets arranged so our daughters are equal ultimate beneficiaries. The house has a recored "transfer on death" to them. The cars are transfer on death. We have done everything possible (that I know of) to avoid probate. The grave is paid for. We have each written instructions on how we want our funerals. Our kids are level headed, ones a paralegal. This took time and planning, but all in place now.

    To contrast, my Mom was spread out all over financially. Had no will. She reluctantly signed a POA to me. I saw that everything was done right and no one got screwed.

  2. #22
    Grandmaster DoggyDaddy's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by spec4 View Post
    It's a job that takes work. We have all of our financial assets arranged so our daughters are equal ultimate beneficiaries. The house has a recored "transfer on death" to them. The cars are transfer on death. We have done everything possible (that I know of) to avoid probate. The grave is paid for. We have each written instructions on how we want our funerals. Our kids are level headed, ones a paralegal. This took time and planning, but all in place now.

    To contrast, my Mom was spread out all over financially. Had no will. She reluctantly signed a POA to me. I saw that everything was done right and no one got screwed.
    I'm planning on getting a lawyer to finalize everything, but I figured it would be good to gather as much information in advance to save them billing me for "leg work" that I could do. That's the kind of info I'm looking for.

  3. #23
    Home on the Range chocktaw2's Avatar

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    F...k him. To put your family thru this = selfish. What an idiot. Not sorry. I'm amazed anybody really cares anymore. But, that is your choice.
    Just because you're at the center of the Universe doesn't mean you're in it.

  4. #24
    Home on the Range chocktaw2's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by DoggyDaddy View Post
    I really need to do this too. For those that have, how much detail is required? I assume account numbers for bank accounts, 401K's and the like are necessary (although I have DoggyMama as the beneficiary to both my 401K's as of now), but what about other physical property, like guns, and whatnot? Do you need to itemize every single possession, or is it enough to say "all of this stuff goes to _______"?
    If you haven't already done this, have everything that has a title with it, (ie. vehicles, property) with 2 names on it. Yours, and the spouse.
    Just because you're at the center of the Universe doesn't mean you're in it.

  5. #25
    Grandmaster Cameramonkey's Avatar

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    And even a will isnt foolproof. When my Grandma passed away her two daughters were to split things. My aunt got the not insignificant amount of cash in the bank. Mom got the property, and owed my aunt half the fair market value in cash. For ease of the story, lets call it $50k in cash, and the value of the property was $100k. Lets call it another $20k in taxes, repairs, tear-down, etc. So to be fair, Aunt should get $90k in cash, mom should end up with the $100k house minus $40k in cash. On paper it was 100k/100k. So more or less fair.

    Mom had to pay to tear down the house because it was beyond repair to make it sellable. Mom also had to pay property taxes and repairs for several years while they figured out what to do with it. To this day, even being told repeatedly by mom AND the attorney, my aunt thinks she is owed another $100k above and beyond the cash in the bank. (She thinks mom owes here 100% of the cash value of the property AND the cash) She doesnt even think she should help pay for any of the expenses on the property. Without any expenses she was owed $50k for half the house. She wouldnt even consider calling it $40k owed to be fair. Nope. She insists she is owed $100k (plus the cash in savings ) because "mom didnt say anything in the will about any costs associated with the house. Not my problem" My mom has already paid her what she is owed for the property and things are legally settled. But she still insists that my mom still owes her more.

    Yep, my aunt thinks that its fair that she ends up with $150k in cash and my mom gets to effective buy a $100k second house from my aunt for $120k. Madness. MY aunt doesnt have a leg to stand on, but she still is butthurt about it. (but doesnt let it interfere with their day to day relationship)
    Last edited by Cameramonkey; 06-25-2020 at 18:38. Reason: clarifying
    Quote Originally Posted by Kirk Freeman View Post
    A confused cop is an arresty cop.
    Quote Originally Posted by hoosierdoc View Post
    also, where do we sign up to touch Frank's equipment?

  6. #26
    Grandmaster Mr Evilwrench's Avatar

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    A will just makes probate slightly easier for them to figure out. It still takes too long and too much money. That's where the trust comes in. You just collect a few signatures and you're done. You will want a lawyer in on this to nail down anything that's likely to squeek.

    My mom and dad prepaid their funerals and interment. Nothing that complex or expensive. My mom is still in an apartment, but shopping for a retirement home. She's 92, doing very well, but that can't last forever.
    Geeking out on ancestry; 17th great grandson of Geoffrey Chaucer, and a bunch of dukes, knights, princesses, kings and stuff. Of course, once you turn over a rock and one king crawls out, you're pretty much infested with them. And what did I tell you? Charlemagne, Holy Roman Emperor, Charles "The Hammer" Martel, and a truckload of others. This is getting better: "The Bonny Earl O'Moray" was an ancestor, and the origin of the term mondegreen: They slew the Earl O'Moray and Lady Mondegreen

  7. #27
    Grandmaster Tactically Fat's Avatar

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    Y'all: As has been stated - Funerals are a RACKET. A racket that you're seemingly forced into. Afterall, who shops around for funeral services after a loved one has passed away?

    If you want a burial - order that ish online. Seriously. You'll save THOUSANDS of dollars. THOUSANDS.

    And if you really want to save the $, get a direct cremation - especially if you know or are not concerned with cause of the death. It should cost like $400-1000 depending on where you are.

  8. #28
    Master KittySlayer's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tactically Fat View Post
    Y'all: As has been stated - Funerals are a RACKET. A racket that you're seemingly forced into. Afterall, who shops around for funeral services after a loved one has passed away?
    And the funeral directors are worse than used car salesmen. Preying on the grief and confusion of the family and pitting family members emotions against each other.


    Definitely pre-plan your funeral and have the plan in writing with your wishes. Then have that awkward communication where you review your plan verbally to make sure your family understands your wishes. This keeps the funeral director from upselling services to grieving family members.

    The prepayment of the funeral is a whole different topic. For someone not on deaths door because of age/health there are a lot of financial arguments against it. Keep in mind it may not be an entirely financial decision though and removing that cost from the pile of money a divisive family may fight over could be worth paying for in advance.
    When seconds matter the 2nd Amendment matters.

  9. #29
    Master spec4's Avatar

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    As I understand it, if you prepay a funeral and the funeral home goes under, you are an unsecured lender to the home.

  10. #30
    Grandmaster Cameramonkey's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tactically Fat View Post
    Y'all: As has been stated - Funerals are a RACKET. A racket that you're seemingly forced into. Afterall, who shops around for funeral services after a loved one has passed away?

    If you want a burial - order that ish online. Seriously. You'll save THOUSANDS of dollars. THOUSANDS.

    And if you really want to save the $, get a direct cremation - especially if you know or are not concerned with cause of the death. It should cost like $400-1000 depending on where you are.
    And this lady explains it all in detail and how not to get scammed.


    Quote Originally Posted by Kirk Freeman View Post
    A confused cop is an arresty cop.
    Quote Originally Posted by hoosierdoc View Post
    also, where do we sign up to touch Frank's equipment?

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