Group not doing much

The #1 community for Gun Owners in Indiana

Member Benefits:

  • Fewer Ads!
  • Discuss all aspects of firearm ownership
  • Discuss anti-gun legislation
  • Buy, sell, and trade in the classified section
  • Chat with Local gun shops, ranges, trainers & other businesses
  • Discover free outdoor shooting areas
  • View up to date on firearm-related events
  • Share photos & video with other members
  • ...and so much more!
  • Dorky_D

    Expert
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Dec 4, 2010
    1,188
    38
    So I have a group of guys that we talk about preparedness, and have started doing stuff. The trouble is, the guys are mostly not doing anything to prepare for anything. We talk a good game, but then nothing happens. I am trying to keep the train rolling, but not much is going on and it is getting frustrating. I am sure I am not alone in this as I see this crap all of the time, where people are all talk and no do. Any advice for motivating the team?
     

    churchmouse

    I still care....Really
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    187   0   0
    Dec 7, 2011
    191,809
    152
    Speedway area
    Get yourself ready. If you wait for them you might be to late.

    When they come knocking at your gates just give them the "Look" and send them packing.
    This is where we are at. We attempted to get the family's involved but new cars and phones are the order of the day.
     

    IndyDave1776

    Grandmaster
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    12   0   0
    Jan 12, 2012
    27,286
    113
    I would say that your two choices are to cheerlead the unmotivated, which will absorb a great deal of time and likely not help given that if they really took it seriously and/or were genuinely interested beyond posturing over a Coke or a Budweiser as the case may be, they would already have their asses in gear. The more productive alternative is to do what you can for yourself and remember that at such a time that things go sideways, you and yours come first because even though these guys talked along with you, they failed to act on it where you didn't. This applies equally to natural disaster or, well, man-made disaster. At the end of the day, the only thing you can really change is what you do yourself, and if these other people are all talk, I recommend limiting the amount of time you let them suck down that you could put to more productive use than trying to motivate the unmotivated.
     

    IndyDave1776

    Grandmaster
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    12   0   0
    Jan 12, 2012
    27,286
    113
    Get yourself ready. If you wait for them you might be to late.

    When they come knocking at your gates just give them the "Look" and send them packing.
    This is where we are at. We attempted to get the family's involved but new cars and phones are the order of the day.

    Excellent as usual. Point more forcefully made with about 20% the verbiage. Maybe one of these days I will catch up with you on this! :):
     

    churchmouse

    I still care....Really
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    187   0   0
    Dec 7, 2011
    191,809
    152
    Speedway area
    Excellent as usual. Point more forcefully made with about 20% the verbiage. Maybe one of these days I will catch up with you on this! :):

    Oh no....you say it so well.
    Having to stand ones ground and turn away people would be the hardest thing I can imaging. Especially kids. You know how I am with kids.
    Thing is, we can not feed/shelter them all. Just can not do it.
    Choices will have to be made. Hard hard hard choices.
     

    Dorky_D

    Expert
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Dec 4, 2010
    1,188
    38
    Yeah, that is where I am leaning with this, but wanted to think it through a bit more and not just knee jerk. It is not really a "take my ball and go home", as much as it is, I tend to cut stuff out of my life that I do not stick with, or is not productive. I like the guys and I am not really mad at them. I am am disappointed that their intentions and actions do not match. I would go a step further in saying they are being dishonest (though probably not entirely intentionally and/or with malice intent).
     

    churchmouse

    I still care....Really
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    187   0   0
    Dec 7, 2011
    191,809
    152
    Speedway area
    Yeah, that is where I am leaning with this, but wanted to think it through a bit more and not just knee jerk. It is not really a "take my ball and go home", as much as it is, I tend to cut stuff out of my life that I do not stick with, or is not productive. I like the guys and I am not really mad at them. I am am disappointed that their intentions and actions do not match. I would go a step further in saying they are being dishonest (though probably not entirely intentionally and/or with malice intent).

    It is easy to sit and plan.
    It is another thing to put those plans in motion.
    Extra food/water/staples are sometimes a push on the budget.
    Finding the space for this is also difficult in some homes with out a basement etc.
    Getting the spouse on board can be a tough deal as well.
     

    Dorky_D

    Expert
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Dec 4, 2010
    1,188
    38
    I think we have the bottom 4 issues, but much of it is because I cannot even get them to plan! I made some effort to get some spreadsheets together, so they could kind of fill in the blanks, but they have not even done that.
     

    churchmouse

    I still care....Really
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    187   0   0
    Dec 7, 2011
    191,809
    152
    Speedway area
    I think we have the bottom 4 issues, but much of it is because I cannot even get them to plan! I made some effort to get some spreadsheets together, so they could kind of fill in the blanks, but they have not even done that.

    Time to move ahead on your own.
     

    IndyDave1776

    Grandmaster
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    12   0   0
    Jan 12, 2012
    27,286
    113
    Yeah, that is where I am leaning with this, but wanted to think it through a bit more and not just knee jerk. It is not really a "take my ball and go home", as much as it is, I tend to cut stuff out of my life that I do not stick with, or is not productive. I like the guys and I am not really mad at them. I am am disappointed that their intentions and actions do not match. I would go a step further in saying they are being dishonest (though probably not entirely intentionally and/or with malice intent).

    It is good to think things through and try to find additional views on the matter you may not have considered. You have to prune your life. One of the most important turning points in my reckoning is coming to the realization that you do not have enough time in the rest of your life for everything you want to do, and I can understand that it is frustrating to see people with potential who do not act on it. As for the issue of dishonesty, I would say that they are being dishonest with themselves more so than they are with you as they are simply giving you the same falsehood that they have already bought into. My guess is that they honestly would like to be what they talk but lack the discipline, the motivation, and/or haven't figured out that this is something that they need to get to work on now, not something to talk about and act on after they get the car paid off, take that vacation, buy a new refrigerator, pay for their kids' college, or whatever else. Further, they have probably not considered the need for sacrifice. For the prepping I have already done, which I see as no more than a decent start, I have sacrificed much including most of the toys and luxuries most people consider to be necessities. My guess is that they are not willing to do that, their respective wives are even less willing to do that, and none of these people understand it as a life and death decision which trumps a new i-pad, a new smart phone, and a new car every two or three years.

    I have also considered what happens when they show up at the door when the SHTF. In most cases all I will have to say is to remind them that they were not willing to let me watch their wall-covering television, swim in their pool, play billiards and drink their beer in their mancaves, drive their pretty new cars, or go on vacation with them on their dime, so then, why do they expect me to give them the food and other supplies that I bought with the money I then no longer had available to build a swimming pool, add a mancave to the house, buy a new car, or go on vacation. The bottom line is that they have a choice and choosing to go grasshopper when they really should go ant is not my problem (even if it is extremely difficult to hold to that line at the time). The bottom line is that it is not reasonable to expect me, or you, or CM, or anyone else to give up the supplies they accumulated for that time, thus sacrificing their ability to survive because the others simply chose not to bother.
     

    IndyDave1776

    Grandmaster
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    12   0   0
    Jan 12, 2012
    27,286
    113
    I also failed to mention that in my case the process runs significantly slower post-heart failure such that most everything I do takes four times longer than it 'should'. That really drains out the sympathy for people who simply choose not to, especially if the reason is the requirement of too much effort for them.
     

    churchmouse

    I still care....Really
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    187   0   0
    Dec 7, 2011
    191,809
    152
    Speedway area
    In my plans there are 6 adults and 5 kids 10 and below to consider.
    The compound will support all of us for a given amount of time depending on the situation/weather etc.
    Ad can be expected I am the main driving force in acquiring/storing supply's as the other adults (my adult kids) are raising family's and doing the best they can. They do their part as required.
    Beyond that the gates are pretty much closed unless you show up with skills and supply's.
    Indy is welcome and he is aware of this.
     

    Dorky_D

    Expert
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Dec 4, 2010
    1,188
    38
    [FONT=&quot]Matthew 25:10 NIV “But while they were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom arrived. The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut.[/FONT]
     

    BigBoxaJunk

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    3   0   0
    Feb 9, 2013
    7,314
    113
    East-ish
    Oh no....you say it so well.
    Having to stand ones ground and turn away people would be the hardest thing I can imaging. Especially kids. You know how I am with kids.
    Thing is, we can not feed/shelter them all. Just can not do it.
    Choices will have to be made. Hard hard hard choices.


    Yes, we're the same way. My wife and I always try to continually improve our preps. My son and his wife do very well also. We all got together awhile back and had a packing party, putting up several hundred pounds of rice, beans, powdered milk and powdered potatoes away in mylar bags with O2 absorbers. My son always makes me proud with his fore-sight and always wanting to round out our preps.

    My daughter and her husband I'm sure have nothing much put back, but they know they're best plan is to come back to our place if they need to. Even without stores, they both have skills. Our total group includes my wife and I, our two kids and their spouses, and their four dogs ( or as I tell the kids, our fresh meat security plan). There are several other extended family that also know that they are welcome any time, and they all have stuff to contribute.

    When I hear others talk about "Well, if anything ever happens, we know we're coming to your house" I always tell them that they can't get in unless they know the magic words. When they ask what those are, I look at them and say, "The magic words are: We brought all of our own food".
     
    Last edited:

    Dorky_D

    Expert
    Rating - 100%
    4   0   0
    Dec 4, 2010
    1,188
    38
    Yeah, there are 6 in my household. It is expensive enough to take care of them, and for these guys that think they are prepers, because they have a couple of Mountain House buckets and guns and ammo, I have not patience for them on this.
     

    Jabberwocky

    Plinker
    Site Supporter
    Rating - 100%
    6   0   0
    Jan 10, 2016
    28
    3
    Muncie
    Some preparations are necessary for various EOTWAWKI events. I tend to get caught up and confounded in a warren of rabbit holes with all the possibilities that could face us, and the focused preparations required.
     

    Small's

    Sharpshooter
    Rating - 100%
    11   0   0
    Dec 16, 2012
    605
    28
    south of Indy
    I thought you only needed guns and bullets because everybody always seems to have time and money for new guns but not for anything else. In my experience so far the people who are already like minded are the only ones who see whats happening. Trying to convince other people and family to prepare is like beating a dead horse.
     

    Spear Dane

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    3   0   0
    Sep 4, 2015
    5,119
    113
    Kokomo area
    Drop em like hot taters and continue on your own. In fact, tell them you are giving up that prepper foolishness and then leave the group. Then continue on your own and with great discretion.
     

    rhino

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    24   0   0
    Mar 18, 2008
    30,906
    113
    Indiana
    My opinion:

    If you have a group that talks about this stuff, but does nothing, limit the discussion of preparations to social-level discourse and do not discuss any details of your own preparations. If they ask, just smile and change the subject.

    If they're not serious now, it's not likely that you can trust or rely on them in an emergency situation where they are not prepared. I don't think you can fix that.

    If you want to build a group, start with one person. Not a small group, one person (perhaps including their immediate family as well). Find someone you think you can trust overall and build a relationship with them if one does not already exist. It doesn't matter whether or not the person is currently interested or involved in preparing for emergencies or if they have interest in guns or anything else as long as they are not against any of those things. When you believe you can rely on them, ask them if they want to collaborate with you on preparations. Start small and if it blossoms, you have won. After you are comfortable with your new prepping ally, raise the subject of adding one more person. Keep in mind that now you and your ally have to both be on board with the addition and you have to both mesh with them and most importantly, the three of you have to mesh as a group. Repeat the process you did with your first ally.

    In my opinion, trustworthiness and reliability are absolutely the most critically important factors. They are far more important than skills or gear or supplies. Those can be learned and acquired at will. You either have trust or you can build it, but you can't but it or borrow it.
     
    Top Bottom