Dealing with Family Non-(Prep) Believers....

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  • JD31

    Plinker
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    Jun 15, 2008
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    I have been encouraging family members to be ready. Put up a little extra food, consider how they will protect what is theirs should things get really bad, to watch the news, be informed, and just basically be ready for whatever comes. My parents are beginning to take positive steps, and my sister always just tuned it out until last weekend when she said, "Here we go again...." She is in denial that things could get bad.

    I know similar things have been discussed before, but how will you (HONESTLY) deal with those close to you, who you have tried to reach, but have been close minded when it comes to planning for the worst while hoping for the best? After reading One Second After, it really makes a person think about how long your meager supplies might last, and how excess charity (to those who were warned, but did nothing) could cost the life of you and your family.

    It would be very hard to turn them away, or to have to encourage them to be on their way by force, but how/where will you draw that line? What more could you do to help them to see the light that things are likely to get worse before they get better?
     

    Arm America

    Expert
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    Jan 26, 2009
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    West of Greenwood
    Tough choice on my part, not hers.
    I would not turn a sister and her family away.
    She's your sister.
    I would continue to prod her in hopes she would see some light.
    In the mean time, I would throw a couple of food cans, a roll of toilet paper,
    maybe a bar of soap a week in a box with her name on it.

    Your Parents sound like their onboard
    nothing but problems would arise if you and them are prepared,
    and you tell their daughter to take a hike.

    Hopefully, none of us will need to draw on our reserves.
     

    JD31

    Plinker
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    Jun 15, 2008
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    Ultimately, I am certain that that is what I would do, but.......how charitable can one afford to be, with 5 mouths to feed already, plus 5 in her family, plus the in-law family, beyond the wife's parents(They are squared away), that will surely show up too.....

    See how the line keeps going, until we all starve? Like you, I would hope to never need anything, but......if there were not a real chance we might, none of us would be talking about this stuff. Unless, we are all crazy!!!
     
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    Beau

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    Jan 20, 2008
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    I don't have enough for myself and kids. But when I am in the way I want to be I will have enough for some family. I draw the line with immediate family. Mom and dad. 2 brothers. Their wives and children. Anyone outside of that better have something to bring to the table. I hope I never have to make a choice like the one we are talking about. But if It came down to myself and my childrens survival I know what choice I will make. I may feel guilty for the rest of my life however long that may be. But my children depend on me to provide for them and make the tuff decisions.
     

    kybares

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    Aug 4, 2009
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    This is a decision that unfortunately many of us will face, but only if our worst thoughts become a reality. Let me ask you this, if your sister was in need, and a total stranger was able to lend her a helping hand but instead turned his back on her how would you feel about that person? What if that person were a friend, would you still count him a friend? This is your sister, your family. With family comes responsibility. Although there are differences right now, if it truely hits the fan, you would be able to count on her loyalty defending her clan like no other would. The extra help you stand to gain in defending your stash, may well make the difference in whether or not you will live to eat the provisions you had the foresight to procure. The likelyhood of things deteriorating to such magnitude are hopefully very slim, the likelyhood of you destroying a good relationship with family over this is very likely. Consider your words carefully. I would hate to face the onslaught of hungry marauders alone. If your parents are gaining steam, and you take them in, and then turn your sister away, you will have a huge problem. Suck it up, ask your parents to help with the financing of her provisions, and make room for her at the "inn". Your parents are her parents, and can apply pressure that you cannot. I don't see that you have a choice. Family beyond immediate is a totally different story.
     

    Dryden

    Master
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    May 5, 2009
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    N.E. Indianapolis
    I would equate this predicament with insurance. Some people have decided not to insure themselves... life, health, home, auto, etc. Some people choose to put that money into another car, or a boat, or a jetski or an exotic vacation.
    That's a choice they have made and if a tragedy strikes, they will deal with it without any sympathy from me.:dunno:

    Nobody can force you to prepare for disaster. Just look at all the natural disasters each year. There's always a percentage of the population that is completely bewildered and unprepared.
     

    tenring

    Master
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    Oct 16, 2008
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    Martinsville
    If she is not a believer, politely inform her that she has been informed in advance and now that refuses to accept that possibility, please do not ask for any of my supplies that I have taken the time and money to acquire as you have only enough for one individual, and that individual is you. See what happens after that , and you will know how to proceed.
     

    ocsdor

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    Jan 24, 2009
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    Lafayette, IN
    Here is a repost of mine from a similar thread ( https://www.indianagunowners.com/fo.../55406-crazy_brothers-limited_food_water.html ) :

    The problem with family members, especially mine, is that they often are too arrogant to acknowledge that you may know something that they don't, and should listen and follow what you have to say.

    I just experienced this over the weekend (over 9/11 issues). Instead of comparing facts and having a conversation, he would rather 1-up me and try to "win the argument" by dominating the conversation (i.e. talk for three minutes and give me 15 seconds to respond).

    The best way to make it through this upcoming crisis is to work and share ideas with like-minded individuals. Let the arrogants, deny-ers, and know-it-alls learn the hard way; even your relatives. If they don't respect your opinion now, then don't let them "respect" your food supply later. Otherwise, they will take you down with them.

    And, speaking of my brother, he told me his SHTF plan was to just kill others and take their food and supplies! So, let that be a warning to all of us to be on guard.
     

    jpo117

    Marksman
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    Oct 29, 2009
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    How do you approach the conversation? Let's be honest, to someone who isn't into the prepping lifestyle, being encouraged to stock up on a year's worth of canned goods and toilet paper to prepare for the impending collapse of civilization could sound a little nutty. If you haven't already, maybe sending your sister to FEMA's Ready.gov - Prepare. Plan. Stay Informed., the Red Cross' Prepare.org | Preparedness Information on the Web, or some other mainstream preparedness resource would help her see that you're not really crazy, just enthusiastic ;)
     

    caneman

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    May 8, 2009
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    Lagrange County
    Which of your own family are you willing to sacrifice to save one of your sisters family. That may be the choice you are making without knowing it ahead of time.
     

    ocsdor

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    Jan 24, 2009
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    Lafayette, IN
    How do you approach the conversation? Let's be honest, to someone who isn't into the prepping lifestyle, being encouraged to stock up on a year's worth of canned goods and toilet paper to prepare for the impending collapse of civilization could sound a little nutty.

    One way to start the conversation is to non-chalantly show the person what you are doing to stock-up. A good argument for "it will never happen" is to point out how fast and for how long ammunition dried up because people are panicking. If you can't sell them on the SHTF scenarios, then just point out the fact that if enough other people believe in SHTF and those people panic, then just the panic from the belief by the believers is enough to wipe out the food supply, even for a short period.

    This is the logic I use on my wife just to get her to keep the cabinets full (a month supply). Of coarse, once my "super workbench" is complete, the supplies will really build up.
     

    originalhonkey

    Sharpshooter
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    Feb 26, 2009
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    greenwood
    do they have any skills or things of value that they could bring to the table? they might not know they even have these items or if they do have them they dont know there real value. for instance a huge genny,4x4 truck, heater, tents and so on. thing the average joe has thats not a if the SHTFer. i guese what im getting at is if they had a tiller to do a garden and you were going to buy one maybe you could spend that amount on extra food,ammo,fuel,tp and on and on and on.look AT IT AS trade.im were your at with my sister and unfortunatly they dont have a pot to poop in. so what im left with is getting ready for 2 families. i know no matter how justified i would be in turning them down or away i couldnt do it. since i know i cant leave them behind its what i have to do. now that being said i have started not by talking about getting ready but by sugesting to them things like a gen. for when the power is out in a storm so the basment wont flood or the food wont spoil.since my dad and my wife are going to do the garden canning thing she offerd my sister a spot in the garden to grow and can. she has know interest in the can goods she will make but the bonding time she gets with the family. little does she know we are setting those aside for her family. im over preaching to them and now im on to manipulating every thing i can to get things done with out a fight. i dont care how its gets done as long as we survive. i hope you can find your way. good luck
     

    Garb

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    May 4, 2009
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    And, speaking of my brother, he told me his SHTF plan was to just kill others and take their food and supplies! So, let that be a warning to all of us to be on guard.[/quote]

    I've encountered people who think like this also. I say when the shtf, we can bump them on the noggin with a baseball bat a few good times. :bat:
     

    techres

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    You will need extra hands and bodies for work and security shifts. Stock heavy and have a few spare mosins.

    Seriously.
     

    caneman

    Marksman
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    May 8, 2009
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    Lagrange County
    To start, many of the folks here have the money to spend more on a knife than I've ever had to spend on a gun (my fault - not yours). So, I'm starting from a lower level than many. I'm doing what I can to accumulate enough to save my family for a period of 3-4 weeks on short rations (8 people) and that's still a huge amount of food. If I tried to handle my brothers family (another 6 people) I'd be giving my own kids and grandkids a death sentence. Notice I haven't even mentioned a neighbor or friend.

    Someplace, everyone might have to draw a line. Are you prepared mentally to do that? Are you prepared to let your own family die because you couldn't?

    If God gives me the power to divide the loaves and fishes, I'll do it gladly. Not likely to happen though.
     

    flagtag

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    Apr 27, 2008
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    Christmas is coming up - go to BePrepared.com and buy her an emergency kit as a gift. (different sizes/contents) At least she will have SOMETHING if anything happens. They also have educational books for sale: "Emergency Preparedness Made Easy" and "Emergency Essentials' Tips For Preparedness" just *might* make her think about taking care of herself and her family. (Maybe)
     

    techres

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    Christmas is coming up - go to BePrepared.com and buy her an emergency kit as a gift. (different sizes/contents) At least she will have SOMETHING if anything happens. They also have educational books for sale: "Emergency Preparedness Made Easy" and "Emergency Essentials' Tips For Preparedness" just *might* make her think about taking care of herself and her family. (Maybe)


    Excellent idea!

    I understand and wrestle with both sides of this argument and am equally frustrated with the lack of preparation in my family. At the same time, I know that whatever happens in this life, I will have to answer for in the next. As a result, I just cannot see myself shooting my own family in the front yard or turning them away to certain death. Really.

    Instead, I will do what I can as best I can and try to deal accordingly.

    Does this mean I will go to Indy on a daring raid to save my mom from the burning wreckage that Indy will certainly become? No. But then again, will I turn her away from my door? No.

    More is at stake than just here and now to act and plan that way.
     

    JD31

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    Jun 15, 2008
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    Techres--I think we are like minded in this, and Flagtag--excellent idea about the Christmas gifts.
     
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