Military BS Stories or the last liar wins.

[Brad69]

I assume it was a arms room issue?

 

[Alamo]

been a long time since I had to point out a base pay table to an officer

You made a comeback with the "canned pickle" reference.

Oh the pay was definitely better as a 2nd Lt. We just didnt get paid until we were on active duty. But to come on active duty we had to buy our own uniforms. But to buy the uniforms we had to get paid…wait, didn’t somebody make a movie about something like this?

 

[2A_Tom]

I assume it was a arms room issue?

Bingo.

Failing a Division MET prior to going on DRF1 is a definite career quencher.

 

[Alamo]

No dependapotamus is fitting in that tube...

Ah memories.

GS-4 Secretary at one of my assignments. One of the other longtime civil servants told me that she would marry an airman new to base, let him move into her trailer with her three kids, pay the bills for 2 or 3 years, then when the airman got PCS orders or separated BOOM! divorce.

Got a new airman in my division during one of her temporary single periods. Surenuff, decided to marry her a couple months later. He was otherwise a bright kid and he was warned, but Mr. Happy ruled. Also, surenuff, three years later, when he got PCS orders… Boom.

She was actually kinda skinny, but otherwise just as conniving.

At my first assignment at Tinker AFB, in Oklahoma I was warned about the “Oklahoma virgins“. Divorced with three kids.

 

[SnoopLoggyDog]

 

[2A_Tom]

You need one of these to beat you to death.

ANQIAO Vietnam War US M1956 Field Pack Bag Green https://a.co/d/7BCN7RV

 

[SnoopLoggyDog]

Started out wearing the M17 and M17A1 mask.

Later transitioned to the MCU-2/P mask.

Finished my career with the M50 mask.

Also spent some time wearing an M17 Firehawk mask in Level A.

 

[2A_Tom]

Rag MOPP du du de ood oo.


Now I am really showing my age!

 

[KellyinAvon]

Rag MOPP du du de ood oo.


Now I am really showing my age!

I get it!

 

[KellyinAvon]

2005: Young USAF MSgt (SMSgt my last 15 days there) was at CENTAF-Forward, Al Udeid Air Base, Qatar. This is where I learned more about National Guard and Reserve forces than I ever wanted to.

We referred to both as ARC (Air Reserve Command) since for what we did there were very similar issues, mainly dealing with the dates these units and troops were on active duty. Active duty troops? Your active duty, that's easy. ARC? On a specific date they were no longer active duty and were for the purposes of Geneva Conventions a civilian (NOT a Civil Service civilian, NOT a contractor, a plain old civilian) in the CENTCOM AOR. I figured out real quick this was bad, very bad.

Keep in mind, Me, Jill and Rob (the CENTAF-FWD A1M, AKA the Manpower and Organization team for Iraqi Freedom, Enduring Freedom, JTF-Horn of Africa, and the Coalition Air and Space Operations Center or CAOC) could not actually make changes (read this as fix the mistakes made by CENTAF Rear AKA 9th Air Force at Shaw AFB, SC) to the DRMD (Deployed Requirements Manpower Document) we could only send emails in hopes it would get fixed.

So the next rotation had all the F-16 units from ANG and Reserves. These units were there for 40 days, then replaced by another ANG/Reserve F-16 Squadron.

Active duty? They were stuck there until replacement arrived. ARC? They turn into pumpkins the day after the end date orders.

"The Rear" (what we not so affectionately called 9th Air Force) had 75 positions turning into pumpkins on the first rotation. I had an ARC liaison Colonel come to see me about it, he wasn't happy. I'd already had the problem identified and was drafting up the corrections when he came by, so he was unhappy with "the rear" and not me.

Well, they fixed those 75, and broke another 208 in the process.

More to follow on "the rear"

 

[KellyinAvon]

30 Super Bowls ago!!! 1993: young USAF SSgt KellyinAvon is at K-2 Air Base, Taegu RoK.

Super Bowl Sunday is on Monday morning in the RoK since it's Eastern +14. We we're going to work Saturday and have Monday off. Or so we thought...

Low and behold an inspection team for the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Agreement with the norks was showing up Super Bowl Monday with 72 hours notice. This wasn't the norks, it was a bunch of our own Intel pukes. A couple months before these clowns showed up at Kunsan Air Base (one of the two main USAF bases in Korea) and starting cutting the locks on the munitions storage buildings out in the bomb dump because the keys were 5 minutes away. Caused a theater-wide shortage of these locks when they cut 60 of them.

More in a while.

Edit: I'm back.

So K-2 had (at that time) only 24 Blue-Suiters at the time. War Reserve Materiel Base, had a lot of WRM and a few troops on a ROKAF base.

Also had a HUGE bomb dump. Called a MAGNUM (awesome acronym) the munitions were maintained by the ROKAF with three USAF Ammo troops as the quality assurance evaluators. The MAGNUM was easy, open all the storage units and have a ROKAF Airman standing in the door at parade rest. They had orders to speak to no one from the inspection team. They spoke to nobody.

Then, there was the smaller bomb dump known as the USAF area. Good news: nothing out there that went BOOM!! Bad news: still 27 buildings, each with 3-4 doors. That's a lot of keys, had them on a chow hall tray. One of our Ammo troops and I went around and unlocked all the buildings, then sat in a truck at the gate and waited, and waited. The truck had a radio, AFKN (Armed Forces Korea Network) was the only channel. Chicken Man came on at 0900. Turned it off when the news was on so we wouldn't know the score.

We sat there, all day. You could not know anything about the Military, look at this place with a fence and building that look like these did and you'd say, "BOMB DUMP!" They never showed up.

Now from we were sitting we could see the gym, the BX, a couple other buildings including the AFOSI Detachment (Air Force Office of Special Investigations, NCIS with active duty not all civvies.)

So while me and Tim (from Buffalo, was about to see his Bills lose for the third time) sat there in the truck avoiding the news/Super Bowl score we watched the "Intel" types go in the BX, the gym, the OSI building, like there would be nuclear weapons in the gym, BX, or OSI building. Two dudes in an OD green truck in front of a compound that screams BOMB DUMP didn't cause any light bulbs to come on.

Everyone who had a VCR recorded the game. Two months later would be the last Team Spirit exercise. The norks left the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Agreement over Team Spirit, the norks never came to K-2.

Edit: for those of you who remember, that was the Super Bowl Don Beebe ran down the show-boating Leon Lett.

It's Super Bowl Sunday so bumping this one seems appropriate.

Stayed up to the wee-hours in 1998 (Iceland is EST+5) to see John Elway helicopter into the end zone.

Got up about 0400 in 2005 (Qatar was EST+8) to see the end of SB XXXIX. Adam Vinatieri kicked the game winner for that other team.

 

[Nazgul]

The TV is playing the WW2 "Why we fight series" right now. They are talking about the ships in the Med at that time and it reminded me of something.

On the carrier we had inspections all the time. We were on one of these extended inspection runs when they brought on some "Blue Suits". They were experts in some area and were from every service or civilians. They all wore blue coveralls, the military wore their rank insignia on them. One I dealt with was an Air Force major.

Meet an older civilian man who was very interesting. He sat with us one day at chow and we got to talking. He was a Merchant Marine seaman in WW2 on the Murmansk Russia supply runs. One of his duties was port side stern 20MM gunner when they were under attack. He talked about shooting at JU-87's and HE110 bombers. He said you could see the pilots very easily when they pulled out of their bombing runs.

Told me you could tell when the bomb or torpedo was headed straight for you because it looked like it didn't move and was just hanging in the air. He was wounded by a bomb from a Stuka at one point that hit nearby.

He was never on a ship that was sunk but they had lots of damage at times. The survival rate was very low once you were in the water because of the cold.

This was in the 70's. Very few of these people left now.

Don

 

[SnoopLoggyDog]

Cool video from the early 60's full of B-52s and B-47s. A lot of the same principles apply today.

 

[SnoopLoggyDog]

2005: Young USAF MSgt (SMSgt my last 15 days there) was at CENTAF-Forward, Al Udeid Air Base, Qatar. This is where I learned more about National Guard and Reserve forces than I ever wanted to.

We referred to both as ARC (Air Reserve Command) since for what we did there were very similar issues, mainly dealing with the dates these units and troops were on active duty. Active duty troops? Your active duty, that's easy. ARC? On a specific date they were no longer active duty and were for the purposes of Geneva Conventions a civilian (NOT a Civil Service civilian, NOT a contractor, a plain old civilian) in the CENTCOM AOR. I figured out real quick this was bad, very bad.

Keep in mind, Me, Jill and Rob (the CENTAF-FWD A1M, AKA the Manpower and Organization team for Iraqi Freedom, Enduring Freedom, JTF-Horn of Africa, and the Coalition Air and Space Operations Center or CAOC) could not actually make changes (read this as fix the mistakes made by CENTAF Rear AKA 9th Air Force at Shaw AFB, SC) to the DRMD (Deployed Requirements Manpower Document) we could only send emails in hopes it would get fixed.

So the next rotation had all the F-16 units from ANG and Reserves. These units were there for 40 days, then replaced by another ANG/Reserve F-16 Squadron.

Active duty? They were stuck there until replacement arrived. ARC? They turn into pumpkins the day after the end date orders.

"The Rear" (what we not so affectionately called 9th Air Force) had 75 positions turning into pumpkins on the first rotation. I had an ARC liaison Colonel come to see me about it, he wasn't happy. I'd already had the problem identified and was drafting up the corrections when he came by, so he was unhappy with "the rear" and not me.

Well, they fixed those 75, and broke another 208 in the process.

More to follow on "the rear"

I was a Logistics Planner deployed to CENTCOM after 9/11. Our team and the PERSCO (Personnel Accountability) team had to meet daily and crunch the numbers on the DRMD, to balance how many U.S. personnel were in country. It was a big deal if our numbers exceeded the local Status of Forces agreement. Sometimes, the Emir would get fussy with our embassy over it.

 

[KellyinAvon]

I was a Logistics Planner deployed to CENTCOM after 9/11. Our team and the PERSCO (Personnel Accountability) team had to meet daily and crunch the numbers on the DRMD, to balance how many U.S. personnel were in country. It was a big deal if our numbers exceeded the local Status of Forces agreement. Sometimes, the Emir would get fussy with our embassy over it.

SOFAs don't always involve watching TV.

 

[Cavman]

SOFAs don't always involve watching TV.

I always thought A SOFA card helped get ya out of trouble with the Korean national police after a drunken incident

 

[actaeon277]

 

[actaeon277]

 

[Hawkeye]

H

Well, the second time wasn't the charm... Try, try again?

 

[actaeon277]

Huh?