Like I said, you gotta do what you gotta do. Take some training classes and you'll do in practice what you do in training. If you train with an instructor who knows what he's talking about, you'll be all the safer for it.
I try not to be judgemental. Everyone is different. There are universal rules for handling guns, but everyone has to interpret them in a manner they are comfortable with. We all have our own internal truths for things that we go by. As long as what you do makes sense to you and doesn't hurt anyone else, I'm okay with it, even if it's different from what I do. If you train with an external safety enough, it's unlikely you'll ever have an issue with it.
Right there with you. To each their own and train with what and how you carry. Each person has their own requirements and there are plenty of hardware configurations out there to meet those.
Though I will say, the cause of this:
Decades ago I had a friend shoot himself in the leg, and another discharge a gun in the house accidentally b/c of handling guns w/o the safety on that were loaded.
Was not due to handling a gun without the safety on, but rather in unsafe gun handling. Unless one of Kirk's often mentioned complete multiple hardware failures was in play, and even then, this should not have occurred.
Again, I don't discourage anyone if they want a safety, etc. But don't blame an issue on the safety not being engaged. The safety not being on, is not what pulled the trigger while pointing the gun at something that it should not have been pointing at.