bystander cpr

[freekforge]

We took a mini family vacation with us leaving Friday and coming home Sunday. Something told both my wife and I that we should stay another night and call off on Monday even though the trip was pretty sucky up to that point.

We managed to get another cabin right next to the one we had previously stayed in. So later Sunday night we hear yelling and both my wife and I thought it was the neighbors in the cabin we had previously stayed in fighting. After a couple minutes we hear a woman yelling help and my wife rushes inside and tells me the neighbor is dead.

I grab my light and run over and sure enough the male is on the floor with no breathing or pulse. I start compressions and send my wife and the guys wife to find help because we had no signal and only a couple cabins were occupied.

My wife while still managing the wife and our kids found a guy and told (more like ordered) him to drive down to the park hq to get help (he refused to physically help). My wife then managed to find a spot that had signal and reached 911 and relayed information.

My wife wanted to relieve me but I told her to stay out of the room in an attempt to protect her. My wife found someone to help but not before I spent 20 minutes alone doing cpr. With an additional 5 minutes with help.

A dnr employee came with an aed and we zapped him. When I was alone with the guy it was the most alone I've ever felt.

Then the calvary came and honestly i almost cried tears of joy. My wife was a Rockstar the whole time. I fell in love with her all over again watching her calmly and clearly direct first responders where to go and again relaying information and ,despite my protest, coming into the room and helping where she could.

Then she started comforting the wife and did so for 3 hours until she got a ride to the hospital.

The feeling is nothing like I expected. I've never done cpr alone and I've sure as hell never done it that long and I've never done it for someone that I had no responsibility to. The guy made it through the night but passed that morning.

I worked harder to save that man than I have ever worked in my life. I've never tried so hard to do something and only to have it fail hit me so hard.

I've never really been bothered by doing cpr regardless of the out come because the way I always seen it was I'm not a Dr so if it works great if not welp I ain't no doctor. But this time was different.

I've seen locomotive vs. POV accidents but for some reason this is probably the most traumatic scene I've seen.

I'm so worried about my wife I didn't want her to see it but she has a such good heart that she put herself in there to help. It breaks my heart that she saw what she saw and heard what she heard. I'm so proud of her and what she did.

She doesn't see it but she's the one that got him the advanced care he needed and because of her his family was able to say goodbye and then to sit and comfort the wife for so long, she's my hero.

Really just wanted to vent for a minute it's been a rough couple days

 

[actaeon277]

Good job. To you AND the wife.

It's sad that he passed.
But, in the movies CPR works almost every time.
I forget what the real rate is, but it is MUCH less than shown on TV.

And CPR for 15 minutes yourself, and 5 minutes with help.
DUDE.
That was a heck of a workout.

My hats off to you.

 

[Twangbanger]

Incredible story. I imagine the world really tunneled in on you. You did good and deserve some rest for yourself.

 

[JCSR]

I just hope I can perform as well as you in that situation if need be. God bless you both. You really need a vacation now.

 

[Cameramonkey]

Good on you, sir. You did your absolute best. Dont sweat the outcome. God knows our time, and no matter what we try to do to stop him and claw our brethren back to this mortal coil, it doesnt always work. You did your absolute best.

Your lovely bride will be fine, I'm sure. If she's calmly barking orders, you got nothing to worry about. Remember women are usually better at this than we are.

 

[VostocK]

I just hope I can perform as well as you in that situation if need be.

Same. I don't know if I would be able to keep going for a half hour, especially on a stranger. CPR is exhausting, and that's a long time to be alone in a life or death situation.

OP what you did would definetly fall into the heroic category, no matter what the outcome was. It was that mans time to go, despite your best efforts and the efforts of the doctors.

I'm sure that mans family will be eternally grateful for your effort despite the outcome, and hopefully time will restore a sense of peace to you and your wife. I don't know you personally, but I am proud of you.

 

[jwamplerusa]

We took a mini family vacation with us leaving Friday and coming home Sunday. Something told both my wife and I that we should stay another night and call off on Monday even though the trip was pretty sucky up to that point.

We managed to get another cabin right next to the one we had previously stayed in. So later Sunday night we hear yelling and both my wife and I thought it was the neighbors in the cabin we had previously stayed in fighting. After a couple minutes we hear a woman yelling help and my wife rushes inside and tells me the neighbor is dead.

I grab my light and run over and sure enough the male is on the floor with no breathing or pulse. I start compressions and send my wife and the guys wife to find help because we had no signal and only a couple cabins were occupied.

My wife while still managing the wife and our kids found a guy and told (more like ordered) him to drive down to the park hq to get help (he refused to physically help). My wife then managed to find a spot that had signal and reached 911 and relayed information.

My wife wanted to relieve me but I told her to stay out of the room in an attempt to protect her. My wife found someone to help but not before I spent 20 minutes alone doing cpr. With an additional 5 minutes with help.

A dnr employee came with an aed and we zapped him. When I was alone with the guy it was the most alone I've ever felt.

Then the calvary came and honestly i almost cried tears of joy. My wife was a Rockstar the whole time. I fell in love with her all over again watching her calmly and clearly direct first responders where to go and again relaying information and ,despite my protest, coming into the room and helping where she could.

Then she started comforting the wife and did so for 3 hours until she got a ride to the hospital.

The feeling is nothing like I expected. I've never done cpr alone and I've sure as hell never done it that long and I've never done it for someone that I had no responsibility to. The guy made it through the night but passed that morning.

I worked harder to save that man than I have ever worked in my life. I've never tried so hard to do something and only to have it fail hit me so hard.

I've never really been bothered by doing cpr regardless of the out come because the way I always seen it was I'm not a Dr so if it works great if not welp I ain't no doctor. But this time was different.

I've seen locomotive vs. POV accidents but for some reason this is probably the most traumatic scene I've seen.

I'm so worried about my wife I didn't want her to see it but she has a such good heart that she put herself in there to help. It breaks my heart that she saw what she saw and heard what she heard. I'm so proud of her and what she did.

She doesn't see it but she's the one that got him the advanced care he needed and because of her his family was able to say goodbye and then to sit and comfort the wife for so long, she's my hero.

Really just wanted to vent for a minute it's been a rough couple days

@freekforge

Good on you and your wife! You both stepped up, which sadly so few do.

 

[mom45]

We get certified at work and update our licenses as required, but I've never had to use it yet. It does make me feel better about babysitting the grandbabies with the knowledge I've been given in the course.

 

[freekforge]

Ive been thinking a lot about it all and I think it's a combination of things that made it hit as hard as it did. I think because i was a bystander not a first responder anymore that I didn't have the on ramp and off ramp for the adrenaline. I didn't have the couple minutes in the car to think about it it was just an immediate response. And like I said I've never felt so alone as I did in the 20minutes that I was alone with him and even in the 5 minutes after that that the neighbor helped it was still insanely lonely. The fact that I was thinking of eating just 12 hours before at the table that he was dead at sucked. Knowing my wife was going to see and hear things I never wanted her to. Then something I never experienced as a first responder, was when it was done it was done. There was no paper work no high fives no going to the hospital to follow up I was standing there in the silence looking at were probably 15-20 people just stood trying to save a guy.

My wife is my hero I can never thank her and I hope I can help walk her through all this. She got really involved with the family over the 3.5 hr ordeal. I wanted to to have shallow small talk with the wife to keep her occupied but my wife is too loving and sweet and sat down and had some deep and long conversations with her. I know she feels terrible and confused. I hope she eventually sees that she was the hero even though it wasnt a win.

 

[patience0830]

FF, I've had basically the same experience, minus the wife. I was much younger and I don't know if I could do 30 minutes of compressions these days. Your wife is a good one. Hug her and count your blessings. Figure God put you two there for his own reasons.

 

[freekforge]

Good job. To you AND the wife.

It's sad that he passed.
But, in the movies CPR works almost every time.
I forget what the real rate is, but it is MUCH less than shown on TV.

And CPR for 15 minutes yourself, and 5 minutes with help.
DUDE.
That was a heck of a workout.

My hats off to you.

My wife was amped up thinking everything was going to be fine and when things calmed down I pulled her aside and told her it was probably less than a 5% chance given I believe it's 5-10% average outside of hospitals and this guy was down for atleast 5minutes before I started compressions. The last time I did cpr it was successful but there was immediate cpr given and then fd arrived within 5 minutes and I was only relieving the firefighters and eats. So that was a win then a guy at the shop ODd and I told my wife that night that the odds aren't anywhere near being in my favor anymore.


Another bothersome part of it for me was the positioning of the body on my arrival. Not to be too graphic but his butt was still in the chair head was on the floor and his legs were hanging in a weird way. Combine that with the blood pooling in his face scalp and the tips of his ears and the amount of vomit present when I got there it was like something out of a nightmare.

Then all the cowards that hid away in their cabins just filled me with anger and hatred. I used to view things differently than i do now after the last few years ive realized i have no tolerance for cowards. Used to i saw it as everyone has a line in the sand that they cant cross and thats okay but i dont see it thag way anymore.

All I could think of in the moment was "here am I lord send me" and a thirty seconds out shirt I saw that said "no one is coming , it's up to us".

 

[Gabriel]

CPR isn't as easy as people think and it's damn exhausting. Twenty minutes is a hell of a long time without anyone to switch out with. Good job for stepping up when no one else would.

As a side note, I've never done CPR on anyone that ended up living... and I've done it a lot.

 

[Gabriel]

Good job. To you AND the wife.

It's sad that he passed.
But, in the movies CPR works almost every time.

Plus, on tv shows the victim is always sprawled out in a wide open area and hasn't **** themselves or puked blood all over.

 

[freekforge]

CPR isn't as easy as people think and it's damn exhausting. Twenty minutes is a hell of a long time without anyone to switch out with. Good job for stepping up when no one else would.

As a side note, I've never done CPR on anyone that ended up living... and I've done it a lot.

Yea I think my wife thought it was going to be a TV style save. Then I told her about the odds and then I think she thought maybe it would just be a brain damage type deal. The last time I did it was the only save and I wasn't that involved I think I did less than a minute on him. The fd guys did all the work I just showed up to make us pd guys look good lol.

 

[Cameramonkey]

Then all the cowards that hid away in their cabins just filled me with anger and hatred. I used to view things differently than i do now after the last few years ive realized i have no tolerance for cowards. Used to i saw it as everyone has a line in the sand that they cant cross and thats okay but i dont see it thag way anymore.

To be fair, they did you a favor. The average person has no clue what to do, and would just be in the way.

I'll take your situation over everyone pouring out of the cabins, gawking, telling you that you are doing it wrong, thinking they know what to do. Or even worse, interfering actively by not doing the right thing.

I'll take going solo over fighting idiots on top of doing all the work.

 

[Ark]

Well now you have the utterly priceless knowledge that your wife is actually useful in a crisis and not a liability.

 

[Ziggidy]

You did good, and so did your wife.

Did CPR on my mom for 15 minutes; don’t know where the strength came from. I also did CPR on an old man who passed out in his car and his wife was screaming. He was in a KMart parking lot and passed out and hit one of the poles, dragged him out and did CPR till the paramedics came, and then some. I think they thought I was a doctor because after failing to intubate twice they asked me if I wanted to try. Those were the only 2 times I had to do CPR alone.

I probably have been in similar situations hundreds if not thousands of times in my life but only twice was it alone. Quite different, it’s never easy.

Praise God you and your wife were there. It may give the family of the deceased some closure knowing that their actions did help, even if it was screaming for someone else to respond.

The adrenaline crash can be harder to handle than the rush.

 

[freekforge]

To be fair, they did you a favor. The average person has no clue what to do, and would just be in the way.

I'll take your situation over everyone pouring out of the cabins, gawking, telling you that you are doing it wrong, thinking they know what to do. Or even worse, interfering actively by not doing the right thing.

I'll take going solo over fighting idiots on top of doing all the work.

Oh when help arrived it wasn't very good help but we made do. I had my relief do compressions as normal but I had a hand on top of theirs pushing down and keeping tempo. Their tempo was too slow and the depth was too shallow. But it gave me 30seconds to rest one arm which was greatly needed since my chest is all messed up from a surgery in highschool. After the 30 seconds I took over until the guys wife came into the room and I did the same with her. She was obviously a mess and panicking but I put my hand on top of hers and started singing staying alive as calmly as I could to one keep tempo and two calm her down a bit.

The 911 operator counting off only added to the confusion and eventually I had someone take the phone in the other room because she wouldn't shut up. She would go from counting off to telling me to trade off even when no one was there to trade off with, to trying to explain cpr then back to counting off. I asked as politely as possible for her to stop I told her I had police and fire experience and we had the cpr part we just needed help. But as dispatchers do she decided talking down to people was the best course of action. Even when help arrived she was still acting like she was the all knowing first responder and all the firefighters and cops were just stupid. She even told me to put him in the recovery position while doing cpr which is a completely new one to me. Have I ever mentioned I've never been too fond of a lot of dispatchers?

 

[The Bubba Effect]

God bless you and your wife, FF.

You showed love and service to strangers in crisis.

On, what was probably one of the worst days in those peoples' lives, a couple of strangers showed up, took charge, and did what could be done.

Again, God bless you and your wife.

 

[frenchiectfd2203]

We took a mini family vacation with us leaving Friday and coming home Sunday. Something told both my wife and I that we should stay another night and call off on Monday even though the trip was pretty sucky up to that point.

We managed to get another cabin right next to the one we had previously stayed in. So later Sunday night we hear yelling and both my wife and I thought it was the neighbors in the cabin we had previously stayed in fighting. After a couple minutes we hear a woman yelling help and my wife rushes inside and tells me the neighbor is dead.

I grab my light and run over and sure enough the male is on the floor with no breathing or pulse. I start compressions and send my wife and the guys wife to find help because we had no signal and only a couple cabins were occupied.

My wife while still managing the wife and our kids found a guy and told (more like ordered) him to drive down to the park hq to get help (he refused to physically help). My wife then managed to find a spot that had signal and reached 911 and relayed information.

My wife wanted to relieve me but I told her to stay out of the room in an attempt to protect her. My wife found someone to help but not before I spent 20 minutes alone doing cpr. With an additional 5 minutes with help.

A dnr employee came with an aed and we zapped him. When I was alone with the guy it was the most alone I've ever felt.

Then the calvary came and honestly i almost cried tears of joy. My wife was a Rockstar the whole time. I fell in love with her all over again watching her calmly and clearly direct first responders where to go and again relaying information and ,despite my protest, coming into the room and helping where she could.

Then she started comforting the wife and did so for 3 hours until she got a ride to the hospital.

The feeling is nothing like I expected. I've never done cpr alone and I've sure as hell never done it that long and I've never done it for someone that I had no responsibility to. The guy made it through the night but passed that morning.

I worked harder to save that man than I have ever worked in my life. I've never tried so hard to do something and only to have it fail hit me so hard.

I've never really been bothered by doing cpr regardless of the out come because the way I always seen it was I'm not a Dr so if it works great if not welp I ain't no doctor. But this time was different.

I've seen locomotive vs. POV accidents but for some reason this is probably the most traumatic scene I've seen.

I'm so worried about my wife I didn't want her to see it but she has a such good heart that she put herself in there to help. It breaks my heart that she saw what she saw and heard what she heard. I'm so proud of her and what she did.

She doesn't see it but she's the one that got him the advanced care he needed and because of her his family was able to say goodbye and then to sit and comfort the wife for so long, she's my hero.

Really just wanted to vent for a minute it's been a rough couple days

Sounds like you did everything by the book. Cpr isn’t magic, in fact it’s a last resort that typically doesn’t get results unless circumstances are perfect. You did what you could, no need to feel ashamed or guilty. Most people refuse to help other people when in need. You sir, are not one of those.