How do we as "good parents" bring our millennial children into the fold?

[BeDome]

You're a blessed man.

I do know this.
I have over the years come across people who did not even know both parents.

... let alone have a chance for their dads to teach them a bit of what he knew. Even more. learning from two grand fathers.

My wife never even knew either of her grandfathers.

 

[BeDome]

This.

It's not a generation thing.Plenty of young kids are huge history buffs and a lot of them know far more about some historical things than folks who lived it.

Maybe they are at an age where they don't feel like asking you a lot of questions about your family history.Maybe they don't know yet how important it is, or will be, to them.

It doesn't mean they don't care about it or will never understand it.

I've talked to veterans, it's not always easy to ask them questions about what they have done and lived during a war.
You never know if them will even want to talk about it, if they want you to ask or not.
Even with family it might not be as easy.It might actually be even harder.

Kind of true what you posted. Even my own, very close brother would never talk of his service, even after years and lots of wishful drinking between us.
I get that, since none ever wanted to talk about those hard times.
I worked with an old Marine sniper at my last job, older guy, crawled in the jungle for three years during Viet Nam, Could not and would not talk about anything.
Ask "Gunny" anything and he would just get quiet, then pissed off if someone asked twice. Otherwise a very mellow guy.

 

[BeDome]

My wife and I adopted out daughter last year, and she turns 12 next month. Despite my efforts to teach her family history she is totally uninterested. I was hoping that she would want to learn about her new family but nope. I hope in time she comes around.

Your challenges are so far advanced from anything most of us can imagine.

Is her original family history open to her or you? Is her new family all she will ever know?

MAN, I wish I had something for you to at least think about. That is a really tough one. We all know that every child deserves a future but how does one make a tolerable transition from the past.
DO you know her past?

Magneto, I wish I had some sage info that might inspire, but you have surely shown me how my original question becomes, not less important or less urgent, but so much more impactful to a specific child.



EDIT: I think I worded that inside out. I meant that your situation is much more impactful to your child than my kids not giving damn that both their grandfathers were blacksmiths and farmers, etc.

 

[KLB]

I never really rebelled from my parents. But like McG said, I remember just not really caring about family stuff mom and dad would talk about. You know what I mean? I'd give them the teenager style listening treatment -- I'd "listen" while my mind was drifting to important stuff like what kind of wheels did I want for my car, impatient sighes, etc. What I wish now is that they'd have written that stuff down, labeled a bunch of those pictures, etc. I seems like once they're all gone is when you really take interest -- it was for me anyway.

For me it was going through my grandmother's things after she passed that sparked the interest. Especially since she never shared any of her history with any of us. While going through old pictures and letters, I found out she and my grandfather apparently changed their last name right about the time my father was born. We had no clue that had happened. I wonder if my father even knew, as he passed away 10 years before his mother did. Since it happened in the 40s I have so far been unsuccessful in finding out what happened, and probably will never know.

 

[GodFearinGunTotin]

For me it was going through my grandmother's things after she passed that sparked the interest. Especially since she never shared any of her history with any of us. While going through old pictures and letters, I found out she and my grandfather apparently changed their last name right about the time my father was born. We had no clue that had happened. I wonder if my father even knew, as he passed away 10 years before his mother did. Since it happened in the 40s I have so far been unsuccessful in finding out what happened, and probably will never know.

By chance was the original name German maybe? I'd read stories, especially during WWI, the anti-German sentiment was do high that people that were named Braun (for example) changed it to Brown. Wonder if it were due to something like that?

 

[GodFearinGunTotin]

I do know this.
I have over the years come across people who did not even know both parents.

... let alone have a chance for their dads to teach them a bit of what he knew. Even more. learning from two grand fathers.

My wife never even knew either of her grandfathers.

I didn't know mine either, only knew one of my grandmothers. I always felt like I missed out.

 

[churchmouse]

I didn't know mine either, only knew one of my grandmothers. I always felt like I missed out.

Well I knew mine. I wish I had missed out.....

 

[GodFearinGunTotin]

Well I knew mine. I wish I had missed out.....

That's rough, brother.

 

[churchmouse]

That's rough, brother.

Just the way it was. There were good people in the family mix. In my life I strive to be everything they were not or could not be.

 

[MCgrease08]

I never really paid much attention to family history until I started getting older. I sure wish I would have taken more of an interest, but I now realize how fortunate I was/am.

I'm a child of divorce, but both my parents remarried, so I had a chance to get to know four sets of grandparents and I still have an 86 year old grandma although I don't get to see her much since she lives in NJ.

My step grandfather fought in the Pacific in WWII and married a Japanse woman after the war. Unfortunately I did not get to know him that well as he was in poor health and that marriage between my Dad and Step mom didn't last long. I miss my grandma's Japanese cooking, that's for sure.

On my mom's side (family name of Merriam) we have geneology records dating back to an officer on the Mayflower. I'm also directly related to the Merriam of the Merriam-Webster dictionary fame. Last year we found out the ugly chair from my grandparent's foyer was a historic wainscott chair that was one of the first pieces of furniture made in the new colony and had been in our family since the Revolutionary war. In January my grandma finally let it go and it was the featured piece in Sotheby's annual Americana auction. Honestly no one in the family had any idea it was as rare or as valuable as it ended up being, but digging into family history is what led to the discovery. That was very exciting.

 

[KLB]

By chance was the original name German maybe? I'd read stories, especially during WWI, the anti-German sentiment was do high that people that were named Braun (for example) changed it to Brown. Wonder if it were due to something like that?

Ironically, it was from an English name, Bettise or Bettis, to a more German name, Brewer. We have pretty much no information about my grandfather, so it has been especially hard to find anything with the name change.

 

[BeDome]

I never really paid much attention to family history until I started getting older. I sure wish I would have taken more of an interest, but I now realize how fortunate I was/am.

I'm a child of divorce, but both my parents remarried, so I had a chance to get to know four sets of grandparents and I still have an 86 year old grandma although I don't get to see her much since she lives in NJ.

My step grandfather fought in the Pacific in WWII and married a Japanse woman after the war. Unfortunately I did not get to know him that well as he was in poor health and that marriage between my Dad and Step mom didn't last long. I miss my grandma's Japanese cooking, that's for sure.

On my mom's side (family name of Merriam) we have geneology records dating back to an officer on the Mayflower. I'm also directly related to the Merriam of the Merriam-Webster dictionary fame. Last year we found out the ugly chair from my grandparent's foyer was a historic wainscott chair that was one of the first pieces of furniture made in the new colony and had been in our family since the Revolutionary war. In January my grandma finally let it go and it was the featured piece in Sotheby's annual Americana auction. Honestly no one in the family had any idea it was as rare or as valuable as it ended up being, but digging into family history is what led to the discovery. That was very exciting.

That chair story is really cool!!

Our family on my father's side (Italian) came in a bit later under the (whip) servitude of a Spanish Lord. Yes, my family were slaves when we came to this land.
Things have seemed to work out OK, though. My house is almost paid off, my wife's car has been paid off for a number of years (time to get her another), my car is close to being paid off and my investment strategist tells me that we are doing better than we think we are.

My father always had a job and I did not ever know we were poor and struggling some over my young years.

Do not have any famous names in the family, Except for an unknown play-write (Carlo Gozzi - which was my father's name but translated to English) from the late 1700s. That wing of the family never fell into servitude, but I suppose cousins will be cousins.

On another, unrelated note, your signature statement mentions Abilene. I wonder why. I was born in Abilene, Texas and Still own family (homesteaded and farmed by my family since a bit after the Civil War ) property there. My share, after all these generations (split with my only living brother) is twenty acres worth of red clay, with decent water worth drilling for - my mom keeps hay and a few livestock stuff alive from a well on that land, but according to her brother who is in the business, the oil is not worth drilling for.
Do we have an Abilene in common?

 

[MCgrease08]

On another, unrelated note, your signature statement mentions Abilene. I wonder why. I was born in Abilene, Texas and Still own family (homesteaded and farmed by my family since a bit after the Civil War ) property there. My share, after all these generations (split with my only living brother) is twenty acres worth of red clay, with decent water worth drilling for - my mom keeps hay and a few livestock stuff alive from a well on that land, but according to her brother who is in the business, the oil is not worth drilling for.
Do we have an Abilene in common?

No. I don't have any connection to Texas or Abilene. It's the opening line from The Grateful Dead song "Loser," about a washed up gambler chasing a fortune he'll likely never find.

The song has references to guns and poker, two things I enjoy. Since this is a gun forum, it's just a little nod and a wink to any other Dead Heads that may be lurking around here.

[video=youtube_share;8Ct1Q7soLBg]http://youtu.be/8Ct1Q7soLBg[/video]

 

[BeDome]

Sorry I did not recognize it. I am kind of a "lite" Dead Head, not hard core, camp out, never miss a tour, etc.

I was always a fan of Jerry Garcia, though. Music was my "first life" and such. Guitar was an unobtainable goal I had at a young age.

 

[spencer rifle]

I don't have any real interest in family history at present - where we are going is more important than where we've been. Except my dad's WWII service - all of our kids know about that. We have some family tree graphs researched by relatives, but I've never been too interested in looking at them.

I thought this was about bringing our milennial children into the "fold" of more conservative thinking. For the most part I'm letting real life do that for me. Now that some of the older ones are paying taxes, they are veering rightward.

 

[Trigger Time]

I don't have any real interest in family history at present - where we are going is more important than where we've been. Except my dad's WWII service - all of our kids know about that. We have some family tree graphs researched by relatives, but I've never been too interested in looking at them.

I thought this was about bringing our milennial children into the "fold" of more conservative thinking. For the most part I'm letting real life do that for me. Now that some of the older ones are paying taxes, they are veering rightward.

By teaching my kids (mostly my older one as she understands more) about the founders and their writings and also the constitution as well as instilling a deep respect for law enforcement and our military and Flag. Also understanding the value of a dollar (that's a work in progress) and to take pride in all you do and that subpar performance in school is NOT acceptable and if you work hard you can play hard as well as like mentioned above the 10 commandments with the values and lessons that follow, then I am fully confident they have no direction to lean except conservative and that my kids will be productive members of society and not standing on a corner with their hand out or at some Bernie Sanders rally.
And I tell my kids every day that I love them and give them hugs and kisses and I'm not too proud or macho for it. Also that 1st place comes only if you work hard and are the best at something. Its earned. Not given. Not everyone in the world is a winner. There are losers. I know they aren't losers so they had better be winners

 

[MCgrease08]

By teaching my kids (mostly my older one as she understands more) about the founders and their writings and also the constitution as well as instilling a deep respect for law enforcement and our military and Flag. Also understanding the value of a dollar (that's a work in progress) and to take pride in all you do and that subpar performance in school is NOT acceptable and if you work hard you can play hard as well as like mentioned above the 10 commandments with the values and lessons that follow, then I am fully confident they have no direction to lean except conservative and that my kids will be productive members of society and not standing on a corner with their hand out or at some Bernie Sanders rally.
And I tell my kids every day that I love them and give them hugs and kisses and I'm not too proud or macho for it. Also that 1st place comes only if you work hard and are the best at something. Its earned. Not given. Not everyone in the world is a winner. There are losers. I know they aren't losers so they had better be winners

Somebody rep this man for me please.

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Trigger Time again.