When do you stop helping a friend

[wtburnette]

Addicts are horrid because they can justify anything to themselves. I've seen it. You've done well by him which says a lot about you, but I agree with everyone else that it's time for him to stand on his own two feet. Give advice when needed, but let him know you feel you're holding him back by constantly bailing him out.

 

[BigBoxaJunk]

My feelings on loaning money to friends have always been this: if they are in need, the money is a gift. If they are able to give it back in the future great. If not, it was a gift and I hold no ill will. I do keep track though and the amount is now over $6,000.

My own policy is never to call it a loan. If a friend or family member needs money, I would decide whether or not I could afford to give them money, with no thought of repayment. In reality, as I see it, if there isn't a signed promissory note, it's a gift anyway. Most importantly, I believe that when we call it a loan, it's just another way that we're fooling ourselves about the situation.

And, even considering it a gift of money, I have found with certain honorable people in my life, I've been repaid in time more than the gift itself was.

 

[churchmouse]

My own policy is never to call it a loan. If a friend or family member needs money, I would decide whether or not I could afford to give them money, with no thought of repayment. In reality, as I see it, if there isn't a signed promissory note, it's a gift anyway. Most importantly, I believe that when we call it a loan, it's just another way that we're fooling ourselves about the situation.

And, even considering it a gift of money, I have found with certain honorable people in my life, I've been repaid in time more than the gift itself was.

Well said.

 

[patience0830]

Well said.

Yup. Although. . . . .



I've had no experiences like that last sentence, unfortunately.