Been nice knowing you all...

[SheepDog4Life]

How do you think it would've gone for me if I'd bought her jeans that were way too big?

I *knew* I didn't know her size. And I just *knew* that I'd get it wrong if I even attempted to get close. So instead of getting her something too big and insulting her - even inadvertently - I opted to err on the comically too small side of things. So she can exchange them for what it is she can truly wear!

The "tactically" correct decision!

Sound logic!

 

[cerebus85]

Try to not make a mess on the carpet...

 

[Cameramonkey]

On a related note, my wife is weird. She and the kids were asking about switching our stick vac from corded to one like we have at the church that is cordless. Yesterday was her birthday and I happened to do the research and told her which one we would need. Her response? "GET IT! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEEEEEEE!!!!" She actually got excited over it.

And she is the opposite of many women. She'd shoot me if I bought her expensive Jewelry, diamonds, etc.

 

[Frosty]

How do you think it would've gone for me if I'd bought her jeans that were way too big?

I *knew* I didn't know her size. And I just *knew* that I'd get it wrong if I even attempted to get close. So instead of getting her something too big and insulting her - even inadvertently - I opted to err on the comically too small side of things. So she can exchange them for what it is she can truly wear!

I swore off buying my wife any kind of clothing years ago. I’ll give her cash, the checkbook, my debit card, but I WILL NOT buy her clothes. Been there, screwed that up.

 

[DoggyDaddy]

I swore off buying my wife any kind of clothing years ago. I’ll give her cash, the checkbook, my debit card, but I WILL NOT buy her clothes. Been there, screwed that up.

I have had good luck buying DoggyMama clothes, but I know what she likes and I know to check the size of what she wears. She is not as good at buying for me.

 

[Frosty]

I have had good luck buying DoggyMama clothes, but I know what she likes and I know to check the size of what she wears. She is not as good at buying for me.

My wife knows what size clothes to get me, it’s just her taste in clothes that doesn’t agree with me. She bought me skinny jeans once. I’m not a skinny jeans kinda guy, more likely Levi’s and work boots but not skinny jeans.

 

[DoggyDaddy]

My wife knows what size clothes to get me, it’s just her taste in clothes that doesn’t agree with me. She bought me skinny jeans once. I’m not a skinny jeans kinda guy, more likely Levi’s and work boots but not skinny jeans.

Actually, clothes aren't so much the issue. It's the other things she gets me. For example, she knew I wanted a vacuum sealer for food storage this year and she got some kind of off-brand that I've never heard of. I looked it up and the reviews weren't so good, so I told her about it. She's going to take it back and get me a Food Saver.

When I order non-clothing gifts for her, I do the research up front and check the reviews.

 

[OurDee]

https://everdear.co/
Memorial diamonds from a loved one's ashes.

 

[yotehunt]

Ha. This was a good laugh. Feel free to add me to the will!

 

[Frosty]

Actually, clothes aren't so much the issue. It's the other things she gets me. For example, she knew I wanted a vacuum sealer for food storage this year and she got some kind of off-brand that I've never heard of. I looked it up and the reviews weren't so good, so I told her about it. She's going to take it back and get me a Food Saver.

When I order non-clothing gifts for her, I do the research up front and check the reviews.

Women don’t seem to understand the buy once cry once concept sometimes. Yes it cost more but if you want it to be right…

 

[OneBadV8]

Didn’t you once buy her a vacuum as a present also? @Tactically Fat

 

[Lpherr]

Vacuums are not a gift in this household.
They would soon become suppositories.

 

[Tactically Fat]

Didn’t you once buy her a vacuum as a present also? @Tactically Fat

Heck yes I did.

That sucker lasted the better part of 13 years, too.

Dyson animal.

 

[BJHay]

4 burn the house down, fake your own death move to Himalayas, sever all contact with civilization and pray she never finds you again!

The French Foreign Legion might be a good choice if you're under 40. Besides I think they'll take care of you in old age.

Men between the ages of 17 and 40, of any nationality, may join the legion. Recruits enlist under an assumed name—a requirement known as the anonymat—but a legionnaire may request to serve under his true name after a year of service.

 

[Tactically Fat]

The French Foreign Legion might be a good choice if you're under 40. Besides I think they'll take care of you in old age.

Men between the ages of 17 and 40, of any nationality, may join the legion. Recruits enlist under an assumed name—a requirement known as the anonymat—but a legionnaire may request to serve under his true name after a year of service.

I'm 45 and fat. Also, at this point, too old to learn to parle francais.