BIL has not called since the will was shared and settled.

[Skullglide]

In a six week period, I lost both my grandmothers and my wife lost one of hers. Hearing what one aunt on my side and my wife’s aunt had to say after the events made my blood boil. “When will I get my money, how much am I getting.”

 

[Tactically Fat]

All who can read this:

See the stories and anecdotes that are in this thread?

Get your affairs in order NOW while you still can.

Have older parents? Have siblings? TALK to your siblings and parents NOW about their arrangements. Assist them in getting their arrangements made.

Communicate wishes ahead of time.

If you're concerned about your own siblings taking your stuff on your demise... Or you're worried about your siblings taking your folks' stuff - get estate / trust planning taken care of NOW.

 

[MrsGungho]

All who can read this:

See the stories and anecdotes that are in this thread?

Get your affairs in order NOW while you still can.

Have older parents? Have siblings? TALK to your siblings and parents NOW about their arrangements. Assist them in getting their arrangements made.

Communicate wishes ahead of time.

If you're concerned about your own siblings taking your stuff on your demise... Or you're worried about your siblings taking your folks' stuff - get estate / trust planning taken care of NOW.

Mom passed 6 1/2 years ago. Dad is still alive so it all went to him. A month or so after the funeral I sat down and talked with him. Asked him to please get a will, get all his policies in one place, get it together so we didn't have a mess. He listened, his will has been done, his policies are all in the folder with his will. The executors have been named, myself and my brother. I know there won't be fighting among us. We don't want the possessions, we want our parents.

 

[Tactically Fat]

Mom passed 6 1/2 years ago. Dad is still alive so it all went to him. A month or so after the funeral I sat down and talked with him. Asked him to please get a will, get all his policies in one place, get it together so we didn't have a mess. He listened, his will has been done, his policies are all in the folder with his will. The executors have been named, myself and my brother. I know there won't be fighting among us. We don't want the possessions, we want our parents.

Losing a parent isn't easy - I'm sorry about your mom.

But imagine dealing with the loss of your dad (hopefully like 15-20 years from now. ) AND all the uncertainty / stress involved in not knowing anything about his affairs - or even where to start.

Both of my wife's parents passed away within the last 5 years. Neither of them had ANYTHING taken care of. Fun stuff.

 

[MrsGungho]

Losing a parent isn't easy - I'm sorry about your mom.

But imagine dealing with the loss of your dad (hopefully like 15-20 years from now. ) AND all the uncertainty / stress involved in not knowing anything about his affairs - or even where to start.

Both of my wife's parents passed away within the last 5 years. Neither of them had ANYTHING taken care of. Fun stuff.

thank you

Mom had nothing taken care of. It all fell on dad, I had surgery the day after her death, my brothers are both from out of town. I did what I could when I traveled the day after surgery, but it was a hard time.

And yes, I hope I have at least another 10 years or more with Dad, he's 75 now, his dad died at 92. There is hope for many more years!!!

 

[GodFearinGunTotin]

I'm with you here GFGT. I think my mom is a little regretful that she won't have more to leave us, but none of us care. My wife's side of the family has money and when I see how the family members are acting(even though both their mom and dad are still alive and fairly healthy), I'm glad we won't have an estate to deal with. Though, ironically, us brothers would not have any issues dividing one up if there was one.

My mom and dad came to America from Germany in the early 50's with two suitcases. They worked hard, raised us boys well and made a way. My brother's and I made our own way. My kids are making their own way. Would I like to be able to leave something? Sure. But if I can't, I can leave them with a solid footing and a means to provide for themselves and their family. I help when I can with my super,duper handy skills and they are happy for that. Mostly they are happy that we raised them with a positive outlook on life and a good work ethic.

That's an inheritance I can be happy with.

 

[ChrisK]

It will be one year on January 4th that my mom passed..it was just my sister and myself that had to take care of everything. We simply spit everything down the middle and it was done, no fighting about anything..

 

[churchmouse]

It will be one year on January 4th that my mom passed..it was just my sister and myself that had to take care of everything. We simply spit everything down the middle and it was done, no fighting about anything..

This is how the spouse and I are setting this up.
I have asked each child what they might want as a personal memento. The boys all picked a specific pistol and a knife from my collection. I will see they get these.
The daughter is still thinking on this (of course) and our estate is to be equally divided.

 

[rw02kr43]

My FIL is in poor health. He's been in and out of the hospital for over a year now. He is leaving me his Miata. I have it at my place cause I had to use it this past summer. I'm not too worried about it cause his son isn't able to drive, his wife doesn't know how to drive a stick, and if my wife wants it then fine, it's already there. I'm not predicting too much trouble with my parents or hers when it happens. My wife's side of the family has shown they can be pretty nasty when some others have passed.

Jason

 

[junk]

my sister has taken care of the "stealing all the money part ". I told my mother that if there is something she wants me to have , write it down . She did , my youngest brother stole that . Oh well . Glad I'm not greedy .

 

[Cameramonkey]

My FIL is in poor health. He's been in and out of the hospital for over a year now. He is leaving me his Miata. I have it at my place cause I had to use it this past summer. I'm not too worried about it cause his son isn't able to drive, his wife doesn't know how to drive a stick, and if my wife wants it then fine, it's already there. I'm not predicting too much trouble with my parents or hers when it happens. My wife's side of the family has shown they can be pretty nasty when some others have passed.

Jason

transfer the title now with the understanding he can have access to it or get it back at any time if he changes his mind. That seals it.

transfer the stuff now, or deal with the hassles later.

I know of several estates that were settled mostly in the last 6-12 months of life because they knew death was imenent. Everyone was given what they wanted by the soon to be deceased personally. "you want my 1100? Take it home today." "you want Grandpa's trains? put the boxes in your trunk." Items that were in dispute were handled amicably by the 3 or more parties via horse trading to make sure everyone felt they were getting what they wanted and not taking something somebody else had more emotional interest in.

The only things left were the big stuff like real property and items they were still needing. But if it was small or easy to transfer it was done before they passed.

 

[churchmouse]

my sister has taken care of the "stealing all the money part ". I told my mother that if there is something she wants me to have , write it down . She did , my youngest brother stole that . Oh well . Glad I'm not greedy .

My only brother was a thief as well but he drank himself into a coma and we pulled the plug on that deal.
Youngest sister tried her best to pull some crap but we only had 2 sets of keys and she did not have a set.
She always wanted to come work on the house when no one else would be there. Nope. Not giving you any keys un-monitored. That seriously sucks when you have to do that.

 

[Cameramonkey]

My only brother was a thief as well but he drank himself into a coma and we pulled the plug on that deal.
Youngest sister tried her best to pull some crap but we only had 2 sets of keys and she did not have a set.
She always wanted to come work on the house when no one else would be there. Nope. Not giving you any keys un-monitored. That seriously sucks when you have to do that.

Worst kick in the teeth I know of personally? A former coworker helped take care of his mother in her later years. He had a no good family that was never around and never helped her unless they wanted something from her. One day he got a short, blunt voice mail; "Mom's dead. Sorry. Funeral was Thursday. Bye." He immediately drove to her house and found it was empty. In the course of 2 weeks she passed, had her funeral, and stripped her rented house clean of everything inside . After it was all said and done they called him to tell him it had happened. Jackwagons couldnt even tell him face to face! That was cold.

He died at 42 a year later of a brain aneurism overnight. We got the call that he had passed by his GF and that she was coming to get his stuff. Not really sure what happened to him. According to her the family wasnt claiming the body and was doing nothing for him. Not sure whatever happened after that.

The saddest part? From what he said, the biggest disagreement was they are VERY religious, and he was an atheist. They just couldnt reconcile that difference and shunned him. Not very Christian to abandon family just because they dont believe in your God. But then again, they left a cold heartless VM to tell him his mom died. Weeks after the fact.

 

[churchmouse]

Worst kick in the teeth I know of personally? A former coworker helped take care of his mother in her later years. He had a no good family that was never around and never helped her unless they wanted something from her. One day he got a short, blunt voice mail; "Mom's dead. Sorry. Funeral was Thursday. Bye." He immediately drove to her house and found it was empty. In the course of 2 weeks she passed, had her funeral, and stripped her rented house clean of everything inside . After it was all said and done they called him to tell him it had happened. Jackwagons couldnt even tell him face to face! That was cold.

He died at 42 a year later of a brain aneurism overnight. We got the call that he had passed by his GF and that she was coming to get his stuff. Not really sure what happened to him. According to her the family wasnt claiming the body and was doing nothing for him. Not sure whatever happened after that.

The saddest part? From what he said, the biggest disagreement was they are VERY religious, and he was an atheist. They just couldnt reconcile that difference and shunned him. Not very Christian to abandon family just because they dont believe in your God. But then again, they left a cold heartless VM to tell him his mom died. Weeks after the fact.

So many people are hiding who they really are behind the veil of Christianity. Far to many.

 

[IndyDave1776]

So many people are hiding who they really are behind the veil of Christianity. Far to many.

This is the reason why persecution is good for the church. When there is real, honest to God persecution, not just the insult-slinging we get from the left today, the kind where you can have your standard of living greatly reduced, get beaten, or get killed for it, that tends to clean out the frauds and the people who are there because granny thought it was the thing to do.

 

[hopper68]

my sister has taken care of the "stealing all the money part ". I told my mother that if there is something she wants me to have , write it down . She did , my youngest brother stole that . Oh well . Glad I'm not greedy .

My dad has it written into his will that my one sister gets nothing because she stole so much from him. It is a shame that when he dies he will not get to see the look on her face when she finds out.

 

[JettaKnight]

So many people are hiding who they really are behind the veil of Christianity. Far to many.

Christianity? Pfft. That's for Sunday. Or maybe just Christmas and Easter.


Besides, there's plenty of preachers that will tell me I need to get what's mine. God told me he wants me to have a lot of material things. It's not in the Bible per se, but in other books...