I CANT BELIEVE WHAT I JUST SAW.

[.45 Dave]

Evidently the old guy was a Jedi master and he used a mind trick to freeze everyone as he unloaded the gun.

 

[paddling_man]

Clearly the old guy was really a four-year old girl in disguise.

 

[LegatoRedrivers]

I missed the OP like a few people here, so I can't be sure what happened. In order to put everyone's minds at rest, however, I'm going to attempt to extrapolate from the comments in the thread what happened using the science of probability and statistical likelihood. I may get a few of the details incorrect, but I'm generally pretty good at this, I've read a lot of Sherlock Holmes in my day. Here goes:

A person whom the OP does not want to identify entered an establishment. The OP later decided to hide the identity of this person, suggesting it is someone the OP knows personally. As we all know, everyone in the world is theoretically connected to Kevin Bacon by no more than 6 degrees - this means that we can statistically assume the person in question was, in fact, Kevin Bacon.

We now come to ask ourselves what store. My personal favorite Kevin Bacon movie is, of course, Tremors, so the only store I can quickly picture him walking into in Chang's Market. I can personally attest that I've seen Keven Bacon enter Chang's Market at least as many times as I've seen that movie, so we can reasonably assume that he frequents that store.

From the story, we can assume that Kevin Bacon was carrying a handgun, and an older gentleman somehow managed to disarm him. From the comments, and the action itself, I can only assume this older gentleman looked something like this:

Only a ninja, you see, would be able to drop from the ceiling, disarm a man, clear the chamber, and unload the magazine before the victim noticed what was happening. Here's an artist's rendering of what this might have looked like:

So from this point, it's fairly obvious what happened.

Kevin Bacon walked into Walter Chang's Market, most likely to replace a pair of extremely tight worn out blue jeans. Dan McNinja dropped from the ceiling with knives taped to his eyes, and disarmed Kevin Bacon (this fact was most likely obscured by Dan's natural ninja prowess, as well as the seismic activity caused by proximity to Graboids.) The OP could not believe what he had just seen, due to the ease with which McNinja cleared the chamber and emptied the magazine while knives were taped over his eyes.

Many other people have also mentioned that no one moved to stop McNinja from doing so. The obvious conclusion we can draw from this is that Dan McNinja was on fire at the time.

Dom, I would like to apologize for letting the cat out of the bag, but the masses had to know. I hope you understand.

 

[Greeper]

^^ that....was epic...

 

[JetGirl]

That was pretty good...

 

[LegatoRedrivers]

That was pretty good...

What can I say, it's a gift.

 

[LEaSH]

damn. jolopnik has its QOTD - ingo should too. And this would be it.

 

[hoosierdoc]

Should have knocked the crap out of the old dude Im old if I did that I would think someone would punch me right in the nose . wow is all I can say.

I'm guessing you would have lost that fight based on the practiced skill he showed in disarming someone...

 

[mdeshon]

I missed the OP like a few people here, so I can't be sure what happened. In order to put everyone's minds at rest, however, I'm going to attempt to extrapolate from the comments in the thread what happened using the science of probability and statistical likelihood. I may get a few of the details incorrect, but I'm generally pretty good at this, I've read a lot of Sherlock Holmes in my day. Here goes:

A person whom the OP does not want to identify entered an establishment. The OP later decided to hide the identity of this person, suggesting it is someone the OP knows personally. As we all know, everyone in the world is theoretically connected to Kevin Bacon by no more than 6 degrees - this means that we can statistically assume the person in question was, in fact, Kevin Bacon.

We now come to ask ourselves what store. My personal favorite Kevin Bacon movie is, of course, Tremors, so the only store I can quickly picture him walking into in Chang's Market. I can personally attest that I've seen Keven Bacon enter Chang's Market at least as many times as I've seen that movie, so we can reasonably assume that he frequents that store.

From the story, we can assume that Kevin Bacon was carrying a handgun, and an older gentleman somehow managed to disarm him. From the comments, and the action itself, I can only assume this older gentleman looked something like this:

Only a ninja, you see, would be able to drop from the ceiling, disarm a man, clear the chamber, and unload the magazine before the victim noticed what was happening. Here's an artist's rendering of what this might have looked like:

So from this point, it's fairly obvious what happened.

Kevin Bacon walked into Walter Chang's Market, most likely to replace a pair of extremely tight worn out blue jeans. Dan McNinja dropped from the ceiling with knives taped to his eyes, and disarmed Kevin Bacon (this fact was most likely obscured by Dan's natural ninja prowess, as well as the seismic activity caused by proximity to Graboids.) The OP could not believe what he had just seen, due to the ease with which McNinja cleared the chamber and emptied the magazine while knives were taped over his eyes.

Many other people have also mentioned that no one moved to stop McNinja from doing so. The obvious conclusion we can draw from this is that Dan McNinja was on fire at the time.

Dom, I would like to apologize for letting the cat out of the bag, but the masses had to know. I hope you understand.

And for using BACON

 

[fullmetaljesus]

I wish I could rep you but it wont let me.

 

[.45 Dave]

I wish I could rep you but it wont let me.

Got him for you!

Alternately, it could have Obi Won Kenobi using Jedi powers. I still am a fan of that possibility and he IS an old guy!
I wonder how a Gaboid would stand up to a light saber??

 

[s13envy]

i read the story as there was an older man that saw another guy was OC'ing inappropriately or carelessly and simply showed him that could easily be disarmed and killed with his own gun. Then just unloaded his clip and sat everything back on the counter. Sounds like he probably taught the guy a lesson which in turn might save his life later on.

 

[jeremy]

i read the story as there was an older man that saw another guy was OC'ing inappropriately or carelessly and simply showed him that could easily be disarmed and killed with his own gun. Then just unloaded his clip and sat everything back on the counter. Sounds like he probably taught the guy a lesson which in turn might save his life later on.

I read it as the Old Guy got damn lucky no one killed him in this maneuver...

 

[Goodcat]

I read it as the Old Guy got damn lucky no one killed him in this maneuver...

This. I'm sure many would have stared in disbelief. However, someone would have made that turn far south rapidly.

 

[cartmanfan15]

I am surprised he did not get hurt as well. If someone grabbed at or grabbed my gun, I don't think it would end very well at all...