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Sharp Metal + Moron = Unfortunate Outcome
- Thread starter rhino
- Start date
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You'll shoot your eye out
Master
- Jan 21, 2011
- 1,781
- 48
I have this cheap little stiletto that I hone on just for the sake of honing. It is thin, narrow and has a point like a sewing needle. Two months ago after a very satisfying session of honing, I accidentally knocked it off the desk I was sitting at. NATURALLY, it dropped point first, sticking every bit of 3 inches deep into my bare foot.
As I looked down at this blade vibrating (twanggggg!) in my flesh and understanding that it's already done, I was looking to recover some good from the situation. Thinking myself very macho and imagining that I am exhibiting superhuman control, I casually slide my foot out from under the desk so that my son can see it. "Hey, lookey here!" I say to my son.
He glanced away from the tv momentarily and answers "Pfffft.... So what."....... At this point I loose a small bit of my iron composure and ask him "Well just how the hell often do you get to see a man with a knife sticking out of him son? What the heck do you mean Pfffft?"
He then proceeds to explain that he has shot himself with a nailgun four times, the grandson shot him with the Crossman powerline pellet gun, he cracked himself in the shin with a 28 ounce Eastwing hammer, a wafflehead one of course. "That little scratch just ain't that impressive!"
By that time I was so disgusted that I snatched the knife out and threw it onto the desk. I lost close to a cup of blood before it stopped bleeding enough that I could get a butterfly bandage to stick on it. The whole time my son cast disdainful looks because I was interrupting his show. The cut was about 1/2 inch wide by 3 inches deep. It still hasn't healed completely, with my diabetes and all.
All my life I have heard that a dull knife was a dangerous knife........ I am just so thankful that knife was so sharp, if it had been dull I might have gotten hurt!
As I looked down at this blade vibrating (twanggggg!) in my flesh and understanding that it's already done, I was looking to recover some good from the situation. Thinking myself very macho and imagining that I am exhibiting superhuman control, I casually slide my foot out from under the desk so that my son can see it. "Hey, lookey here!" I say to my son.
He glanced away from the tv momentarily and answers "Pfffft.... So what."....... At this point I loose a small bit of my iron composure and ask him "Well just how the hell often do you get to see a man with a knife sticking out of him son? What the heck do you mean Pfffft?"
He then proceeds to explain that he has shot himself with a nailgun four times, the grandson shot him with the Crossman powerline pellet gun, he cracked himself in the shin with a 28 ounce Eastwing hammer, a wafflehead one of course. "That little scratch just ain't that impressive!"
By that time I was so disgusted that I snatched the knife out and threw it onto the desk. I lost close to a cup of blood before it stopped bleeding enough that I could get a butterfly bandage to stick on it. The whole time my son cast disdainful looks because I was interrupting his show. The cut was about 1/2 inch wide by 3 inches deep. It still hasn't healed completely, with my diabetes and all.
All my life I have heard that a dull knife was a dangerous knife........ I am just so thankful that knife was so sharp, if it had been dull I might have gotten hurt!
Last edited:
You'll shoot your eye out
Master
- Jan 21, 2011
- 1,781
- 48
Warning! rusty foot/cheap knife.
Most "Awesome stories" have at least a grain of truth. This one has more grains than a box of .45 Colt!
My right foot was edge-wize, with the inside facing up and the bottom facing to the left. The blade went straight down into my foot sort of transverse, from the inside edge across to the outside. It penetrated to within a finger width of the hilt! The shiny reflection on the blade is about where it stopped.(yow! mama!) It didn't seem to hit any bones, if that's even possible.
The knife isn't a DeShives, but a Chinese knock-off of one. I'm glad too, I understand that the real DeShives is beefier and heavier. My foot would be off if there was any more velocity on contact.
I was impressed even if my boy thought I was a wussy. The doctor cussed me out too for not bringing it to him! It was 2 weeks old before he got to see it. He said my being a hard-guy would be the end of me, I can't win either way!
Most "Awesome stories" have at least a grain of truth. This one has more grains than a box of .45 Colt!
My right foot was edge-wize, with the inside facing up and the bottom facing to the left. The blade went straight down into my foot sort of transverse, from the inside edge across to the outside. It penetrated to within a finger width of the hilt! The shiny reflection on the blade is about where it stopped.(yow! mama!) It didn't seem to hit any bones, if that's even possible.
The knife isn't a DeShives, but a Chinese knock-off of one. I'm glad too, I understand that the real DeShives is beefier and heavier. My foot would be off if there was any more velocity on contact.
I was impressed even if my boy thought I was a wussy. The doctor cussed me out too for not bringing it to him! It was 2 weeks old before he got to see it. He said my being a hard-guy would be the end of me, I can't win either way!
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You'll shoot your eye out
Master
- Jan 21, 2011
- 1,781
- 48
Hey! Where did my photos go? You could see them last night. Did I break some kind of rule?
grunt soldier
Master
I cut my thumb crazy open today and with all the stupid sharp knives I have it was actually with a freaking butter knife being used incorrectly. it bled all day long and is oozing as we speak. wtf over.
I couldn't see them the first time through.
I'll bet it hurt too. Cuts from dull things hurt.
grunt soldier
Master
It certainly did and still does. damn thing wouldn't stay closed. I got tired of messing with it today and just super glued it.
Great way to jinx yourself.
I was wiring up a power supply to something, and commenting to someone that I hadn't been zapped in a couple months.....
Zap!
Correction...... a couple seconds.
I have been fortunate with sharp things. Most of my trips to doc for stitches were the result of blunt force trauma, generally to the head.
Working in a wood shop, machine shops and at home on the farm, I have seen what sharp metal + power + moron can do. The power part of the equation should really be an exponential function.
Working in a wood shop, machine shops and at home on the farm, I have seen what sharp metal + power + moron can do. The power part of the equation should really be an exponential function.
Just wait. You did just buy two new knives, you know...
um, yeah. Apparently the streak has come to an end.
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