Welp... lost my gun rights. Again.

[JeremiahJohnson]

I learned - almost the hard way - that if you seek a restraining order against someone, it's common for the other person to retaliate and seek the same restraining order both ways and judges tend to allow it. The'd rather have both parties separated and avoid trouble. Sounds great, right? Wrong. If there's a restraining order against you, then you no longer may legally possess firearms. So, if you start out to get a crazy person off your back via restraining order be aware it could cost you big time. Dang near learned that one the hard way. Thanks to a friend who's a prosecuting attorney in Indiana that gave me some good advice about other ways to handle the situation.

Buck up kid, you'll learn. The legal system is dangerous waters.

 

[LockStocksAndBarrel]

Welcome to INGO

 

[HoughMade]

That's a heck of a post #1.

Welcome.

 

[Rhoadmar]

Fictional sounding.
Possible, yes.
Almost sounds streak like.
Welcome to INGO.

 

[Chewie]

A few have touched on it, but I figured I'd lay it out for you. All I got from your post is that you think you're the victim in your mess. You're not. Two different times, your actions got you into the trouble, not someone else. First time, you decided to run your mouth and your words got you into trouble. Second time, even if the girl is some nutty, vindictive *****, I can guarantee that you saw warning signs long before the drama started. You chose to ignore those signs, and you decided that either you could handle it or it wasn't that big of a deal and it bit you in the ass.

Don't worry, life goes on and it's all uphill from here. You can choose to learn from your mistakes, or you can continue to be the victim everyone is against ,and you'll keep making posts like your original.

Sounds harsh? Reality is. Sorry.

I agree with Rookie on this one. Portraying yourself as the victim quite frequently doesn't work. It's all about actions and consequences.
Life is an uphill road but if you think carefully and seek good advice (sometimes hard to find) you will find the hill isn't really that steep.
Welcome to INGO.

 

[quewing]

First off, thanks for the welcome. I sincerely appreciate it!

I wish I could say this is fiction, but not from my perspective. Of course there's three sides to every story. Two out of there of those sides aren't particularly correct.

I take accountability for the fact that I did say some things I shouldn't have. I don't take accountability for the fact that I was kicked out because of an argument that I was attempting to de-escalate by leaving for a short time. I don't take accountability for the fact that there is a protective order against me. I do, however, take accountability for the fact that I got involved with someone who was much more emotionally unstable than I could have imagined. Luck. :P

You guys are right--I do have a victim mentality going on. Heck, I'm definitely a victim of life's unfairness (as was said by a couple of you). I was homeless. I definitely realize that. The psych hold was partially my fault for opening my mouth, however, it wasn't my fault that it was taken out of context, and made into me threatening my life without being given a chance to explain anything. Unfair, but that's just how it goes. Her getting a protective order to keep me on her leash wasn't quite my fault either. She exaggerated facts, again, taking events out of context, and twisting them to fit her agenda. That isn't my fault. However, it is my fault for getting involved with her in the first place. Her and I both did and said things that we shouldn't have in our relationship; haven't we all?

Someone mentioned that I may have anger issues. Not particularly. I will say, I do need to censor what I say much more than I do. But anger? No. It takes a lot to upset me, and once I'm there, I, 90 times out of 100, choose to just walk away. Anger results in irrational behavior in most people, and I'd rather not have to face the repercussions of that irrational behavior. I don't say things because I'm angry. I say things because I'm stupid. Big difference.

Guess I need to get a handle on my 1A before I worry about my 2A, eh? Haha.

Thanks to a friend who's a prosecuting attorney in Indiana that gave me some good advice about other ways to handle the situation.

Buck up kid, you'll learn. The legal system is dangerous waters.

Out of curiosity, what was that advice?

 

[Jaredjosh]

Fictional sounding.
Possible, yes.
Almost sounds streak like.
Welcome to INGO.

For some reason I got the same feeling while I was reading it.

Welcome to INGO. Hang in there, things will work out in due time.

 

[88GT]

How do you lose a right?

It is not lost; it is infringed. But the practical, real-world difference is indistinguishable to the individual who happens to be suffering it.

3rd. A whole lot of stuff for a 18 year old. But anything is possible I guess. Good luck just the same and learn from both of your incidents.

Like you haven't seen that much and more in young people. My best friend in high school had a more colorful history by the age of 16 than this gentleman has.

Agreed we don't have all the facts here.

And second time you did get due process. You're only entitled to process, but not the results you think are warranted...

to .

Um, I take issue with that. One is entitled to fair and impartial process. If we take the OP at face value, he didn't get it. The process itself can be superficial. Predetermined outcomes that were given legitimacy by following the process aren't exactly compliant with the concept of due process to protect the individual's rights.

 

[wildhair]

She could have accused you of pointing the gun at her....Wow, 18. One things for sure, if you're looking for advice you at the right place.

 

[Blackhawk2001]

I also have to agree with Rookie, with this addition. You've three times shown poor judgment: first, you used ill-considered words in a venue where they got you into trouble (welcome to the world, son); second, you took up with an unsuitable friend who caused you more trouble (happens all the time; learn from it); third, you moved to a very firearms-unfriendly state (New York). WHAT IN THE WORLD WERE YOU THINKING!@!!!! Move to a state where second amendment rights are more respected and start paying better attention to the world around you.

Oh, and BTW: Welcome to INGO.

 

[quewing]

She could have accused you of pointing the gun at her....Wow, 18. One things for sure, if you're looking for advice you at the right place.

She would have definitely had a hard time backing that one up, given that my gun is still in Vegas. Thank God she didn't try, though! And thanks.

I also have to agree with Rookie, with this addition. You've three times shown poor judgment: first, you used ill-considered words in a venue where they got you into trouble (welcome to the world, son); second, you took up with an unsuitable friend who caused you more trouble (happens all the time; learn from it); third, you moved to a very firearms-unfriendly state (New York). WHAT IN THE WORLD WERE YOU THINKING!@!!!! Move to a state where second amendment rights are more respected and start paying better attention to the world around you.

Oh, and BTW: Welcome to INGO.

You're right right, Blackhawk. Working on my mouth. Second, working on my choice of friends. Thirdly, hah, I moved the hell out of there pretty quickly. NY would be an okay place, if they had any respect for our constitution. Not how it goes.

I'm learning. I'm young and growing. It doesn't excuse anything, but that's what I really need to remember. I always feel like I'm running out of time or something. I can't explain it. I'm 18, but I feel like I only have two years or three years left. Heh. Guess I'll be looking up sometime soon, and I'll be 40.

Thanks for the welcome!

 

[N8RV]

... I always feel like I'm running out of time or something. I can't explain it. I'm 18, but I feel like I only have two years or three years left. Heh ...

On your current track and pace, you may be right, sadly. But enough of that ...

Your comment made me think of a societal conundrum that has always puzzled me -- why is it that kids, who have their whole lives before them, are always racing everywhere and are always so impatient ... and old geezers, who probably don't have that much time left, are driving 30 in a 45 and seem to be in no particular hurry? It's completely backward.

Slow down, kid. You're burning your candle at both ends.

 

[zippy23]

I'm not judging just reacting to the story, it reads as though everyone else is at fault, the roommate, girlfriend, judge, politics, etc. The roommate was probably a bad pick, the girl was probably a bad pick, the judge goes off what he has, how would he know the witness, either way the whole situation should have been avoided in the first place by not moving to NY and rooming with a person you dont get along with. Decisions have consequences obviously, not saying its all your fault, just reacting to the story that blamed everyone else. Hopefully you learn that rooming with people you dont know very well or think you know well can turn out terrible, that you should wait years before trusting a women, and that the justice system in this country is not on your side especially as a young male that seems to be moving all over the country for who knows what reason(meaning the judge prolly thinks you have a problem with commitment or arent stable or something). My advice? church

 

[yepthatsme]

Welcome to INGO. There are alot of good people on here with alot of good advice. I really can't contribute to the advice. Everyone has suggested what I would suggest. However, I do have a question for all. If he has lost the right to own a firearm, does that also mean that he can't handle someone else's firearm? Lets say, if he were to go to a firing range with a friend and shoot his friends gun. Is that also prohibited? I am assuming that he cannot be in possession of any firearm, but then again I'm not sure of the legalities.

 

[lucky4034]

Here's some advice... don't be a victim. At some point you have to realize that you have some responsibility, even if its a little bit, for the **** that happens to you.

If some chick put a restraining order on you... you either did what she said, or you chose the wrong girl to continue to be around.
If you got kicked out on the street then you either pissed off your roommates or you chose the wrong people to associate with.
If California put a psych hold, then you either deserved (although I'd argue that nobody deserves to lose the right to defend themselves) it or you made the mistake of giving them a reason to hand one to you unjustly.

I'm not saying this to be rude... I'm not saying this because I think I'm perfect... I'm saying this because I've been 18yo before and have made mistakes and have put myself in lose/lose situations and afterwards wondered why the world was against me. When I stopped blaming the world and started thinking about what I, myself could have done differently...these things stopped happening to me altogether.

The world is a screwed up place... it will never change. The only thing you can do is adapt.... Good luck.

Welcome to INGO

 

[Rookie]

I swear this sounds like my daughter! "It's not my fault that I got kicked out of school with three months left until I graduated. I didn't have a stable place to stay!"
Um, YEAH YOU DID! Until you decided that couch surfing was better than being respectful.

Kids...

 

[cobber]

Um, I take issue with that. One is entitled to fair and impartial process. If we take the OP at face value, he didn't get it. The process itself can be superficial. Predetermined outcomes that were given legitimacy by following the process aren't exactly compliant with the concept of due process to protect the individual's rights.

Nothing against the OP, but I'm going to assume the hearing was fair. Everyone who loses at hearing thinks the judge had it in for him. In point of fact, once you're in court you're rolling the dice and things could go very wrong. That doesn't mean you did not have due process.

Sometimes the facts are not fair or impartial.

Sometimes people 'shoot themselves in the foot' at hearing.

Doesn't mean they didn't receive due process.

IF the OP can show the ruling was contrary to the evidence, or arbitrary, capricious or an abuse of discretion, he would have a point. But since we don't even know the actual subject of the hearing, and didn't hear the evidence, I'm going to 'stare decisis'.


Rule #1 of due process, avoid DP at all costs if at all possible.

 

[LANShark42]

Actions have consequences. Simple as that. Time to stop blaming others for yours.

 

[armedindy]

likeothers have said, stay out of trouble and this will pass

 

[jamil]

We do love giving advice on INGO. So here's mine.

The difference between a wise person and a fool is that the wise person thinks about consequences and avoids foolish actions. A fool doesn't. It doesn't require a lot of experience, though most of us start out as fools and experience enough consequences that eventually we start thinking about them. So the sooner, the better.

So what actions are available to you now that you should avoid? What actions will make your situation better and not worse?