Union jokes (not for the easily offended)

[ATF Consumer]

Unions make everything cost more...from labor to end product...how is that beneficial?

 

[.40caltrucker]

No links provided...

No credit given to author...

Simple copy and paste, which if you read the FAQ there are clear rules against. I guess if you are willing to endanger not only yourself but this great board so many of us call home or a few laughs it is your right.

There was a big deal about plagiarism and the use of others material in the media not too long ago.

When the unions are all finally out of business and the companies go back to cutting your pay so much that at the end of the week you are still in the red people will want them back. Remember the coal miners that started the unions? They got sick of going deeper in debt every week and working for worthless coal company money. Some unions have abused the power they have, a person should have to work for the decent wage that the union has fought for. All I'm saying is if it wasn't for the union EVERY job out there would be paying their employees much less than what they are making now.

Not to burst any ones' bubble but unions are outdated and if they disappeared today hardly anyone would notice.

They went from 39% of the workforce in 1940 to 12.4% in 2009. They had their purpose when they were started, and today they no longer serve a valid purpose.

Still amazed people get offended about jokes, it's a joke. The union must have taken their sense of humor.

 

[nawainwright]

See, I had high hopes the jokes would continue Interesting that someone(s) popped on here trying to quote irrelevant rules (to this discussion anyway) and get their panties in a bunch over something that was good natured and started by the "offended" party. Its like a pollack making pollack jokes and then people getting worked up about it. I heard a bunch of shovels fall over as soon as the thread derailed....odd :P

 

[38special]

No links provided...

No credit given to author...

Simple copy and paste, which if you read the FAQ there are clear rules against. I guess if you are willing to endanger not only yourself but this great board so many of us call home or a few laughs it is your right.

There was a big deal about plagiarism and the use of others material in the media not too long ago.

 

[38special]

I may have plagiarized that last post. Maybe.

 

[Armed Eastsider]

I may have plagiarized that last post. Maybe.

I was gonna say it sounded mighty familiar.

I updated with links and a damn warning that I didnt write the jokes, what else is required? Do I have to get some kind of permit to tell jokes on here or what?

 

[ReSSurrected]

Huh... diaper-loading in a harmless anti-union joke thread... Who would have thought?

 

[slimplmbr]

That's a pretty bold statement. And nonsense.

That is your opinion. What I said was mine.

I lost $5,000.00 in benefits when we went union. The owner made a "special" deal with the business manager. This "special" deal means my boss gets to make up his own rules and we get zero representation from the union. When we ask questions to the BA, it goes straight back to our boss and he chews our rear ends out.
So I pay local dues, national dues, and death benefits to a organisation that does not represent me at all.

The "special" screams greed and abuse of power. Sorry that has happened to you. It is unfortunate that the boss has stabbed the people that made him so much money in the back. Did you guys get to vote if the company became union?

It is pretty transparent here that you are only trying to use the rules, because you _think_ it supports your opinion.

These jokes were obviously grabbed from an online archive collection.
Those site are NOT and do NOT CLAIM to be the original authors or copyright holders.

There is no risk of lawsuit here.
There is a great risk in offending thin-skinned people.

I was FORCED to join a union to be a grocery bagger when I was in high school (and working 2 or 3 nights a week).
Why? Because of the company you decided to work for

Reality is that modern unions led to downfall of GM and only have a purpose, in today's world, in extremely specialized skilled labor.

Good luck with your hopes and dreams.

Like I said some unions abuse the power they have. What has lead to the downall of unions and companies is the abuse of power by unions and the greed of man. When companies give so much power to the unions that a person can file a grievance for being told to work or else that union and person have outlived their usefulness. In union's prime they did serve a good purpose, made jobs safer, fought for a fair wage, and stopped abuse of power. It is very unfortunate that they are now becoming a part of the problem that they fought so hard against.

Did the jokes give me (*)? No, they are made to make people laugh. What I am saying is unions served a great purpose before corruption got a hold on them and I encourage people to look at the start of unions and the history around them. But if you guys want to argue about them, carry on and have fun

 

[CandRFan]

I was FORCED to join a union to be a grocery bagger when I was in high school (and working 2 or 3 nights a week).

You too? I'll never forget it...after I made it past the 90 day period, the union starting taking their cut from my Kroger bag boy paycheck. Retroactive to the first day I first started bagging groceries and cleaning the bathrooms of course.

I asked the union steward what being in the union got me. He mentioned things like benefits and vacation time and stuff like that. Things that he then mentioned that I didn't get as only a part time grocery bagger. He shrugged his shoulders when I asked why I had to pay dues into an organization that didn't represent me in any way and then got mad when I asked him if it was some form of legalized extortion.

I'll never forget it...Spring Break...no school, so I got all the hours I could get. I worked 32 hours and was so looking forward to that big fat paycheck. $64 dollars was my net check after taxes and the union cut, which I also learned was a sliding scale sort of payment since I was still in arrears on my dues.

My dealings with the UAW at GM and Delphi plants across the country were mainly being written up for a grievance if I got caught carrying computers or physically plugging them in, in the plants.

 

[Armed Eastsider]

You too? I'll never forget it...after I made it past the 90 day period, the union starting taking their cut from my Kroger bag boy paycheck. Retroactive to the first day I first started bagging groceries and cleaning the bathrooms of course.

I asked the union steward what being in the union got me. He mentioned things like benefits and vacation time and stuff like that. Things that he then mentioned that I didn't get as only a part time grocery bagger. He shrugged his shoulders when I asked why I had to pay dues into an organization that didn't represent me in any way and then got mad when I asked him if it was some form of legalized extortion.

I'll never forget it...Spring Break...no school, so I got all the hours I could get. I worked 32 hours and was so looking forward to that big fat paycheck. $64 dollars was my net check after taxes and the union cut, which I also learned was a sliding scale sort of payment since I was still in arrears on my dues.

My dealings with the UAW at GM and Delphi plants across the country were mainly being written up for a grievance if I got caught carrying computers or physically plugging them in, in the plants.

Same here, was also a Kroger bag boy in high school (2006-2007). Paid union initiation and weekly dues. Never once got a copy of the contract. Never once saw or heard of a union steward, business agent, or any other union rep.

I made 6.10 an hour (minimum wage was still 5.15), had no benefits of course, but still paid dues.

 

[ThrottleJockey]

The part that bothers me is when I lose money in my business because I have to WAIT for the union lumpers to not only unload me but to break the load down before I can leave with my BOL, and there is always a sign on the wall saying they are not responsible for lost paperwork or damage incurred by them.......

Back on topic....


Hey wait a minute, I'm on break you can't make me post a joke here!


Actually I have a lot of problems with unions, inflation being among the largest. The only union I REALLY have a problem with though, a problem big enough to make me fight, is the one we fought in the 1860s.........

 

[Prometheus]

Same here, was also a Kroger bag boy in high school (2006-2007). Paid union initiation and weekly dues. Never once got a copy of the contract. Never once saw or heard of a union steward, business agent, or any other union rep.

I made 6.10 an hour (minimum wage was still 5.15), had no benefits of course, but still paid dues.

One of my bank locations is in a grocery store that has baggers. I went in one day and they were on strike!

Honestly, WTH was up with that? Do they expect to make a "living wage" bagging groceries?

If I owned the store I would have done away with the position of bagger after that stunt.

I remember as a kid I bagged groceries down in FLA and unions kept tryign to come in. By law they were allowed to talked to us and try and convince us once a year.

They showed up once and at 17 I did the math and asked WTH we need to pay them money for. They couldn't give a single logical reason... it was all the same boiler plate "safer work place", "grievances"... they could never argue the pay as that company paid the best around.

Unions became obsolete the day a machine replaced the canary.

 

[96firephoenix]

can't you choose to NOT JOIN a union? I've never worked a job where there was a union for it, but I do know that a guy I worked with was a USW worker and had been out of work for almost a year, and his union rep helped him get a job at a different local.

I also know that the coal mine my great-grandfather got fired from for trying to unionize blew up a week after he was fired.

that said, I know that unions can do a lot in the way of extortion like the grocer's union and that the UAW is one of the prime reasons for the near collapse of GM.

 

[ThrottleJockey]

Actually the grocery store/bag boy union isn't allowed to strike. They are a NO STRIKE union that really doesn't offer anything to it's members except dues. I decided to keep looking as a young man when I learned this. On the other hand, my brother in law has worked for Kroger for like 8 years now and is earning a pretty decent wage for a single guy with no family, he'll have money problems if he ever tries to change that though.

 

[Armed Eastsider]

can't you choose to NOT JOIN a union? I've never worked a job where there was a union for it, but I do know that a guy I worked with was a USW worker and had been out of work for almost a year, and his union rep helped him get a job at a different local.

I also know that the coal mine my great-grandfather got fired from for trying to unionize blew up a week after he was fired.

that said, I know that unions can do a lot in the way of extortion like the grocer's union and that the UAW is one of the prime reasons for the near collapse of GM.

Indiana isnt a Right To Work state. Meaning if its a closed shop, union membership is required.

 

[ThrottleJockey]

Indiana isnt a Right To Work state. Meaning if its a closed shop, union membership is required.

Not only that, IN is an employment at will state meaning you can be fired for ANY or NO reason at all.

 

[96firephoenix]

so if union membership is a condition of employment, suck it up? that stinks if you don't want to be in the union.

 

[teknickle]

Yes, it was Kroger's. I was only 15 back then and they didn't exactly make it clear during the hiring process that I would be giving a non-tax deductible donation each week that folks that did NOTHING for me.

I worked there for a couple months, then quit for a higher paying NON UNION job a child could do.

Anyone else read the tags for this post?
joke, plagiarism, union, whiny little girls

Yep, that sums it up.

 

[teknickle]

More jokes..

Did you know that Union workers built the great pyramids? It was originally designed as a cube. Each working shift did a little less till the last said 'throw a rock on top and lets go home'.

What do you call the unemployment line in Detroit? Answer: A picket line

UAW = United Against Work



The steward for the Union Of Road Construction Workers called their meeting to order.
"Men -- we've agreed on a new deal with the state gov't. We'll no longer have to work FOUR days a week!"
"HOORAY!!!" the crowd cheered.
"We'll quit work at 4 PM and not 5 PM!"
"HOORAY!!!" the crowd roared.
"We don't have to be in until 11 AM instead of 10 AM!"
"HOORAY!!!" the crowd thundered.
"And now, even though 99% of the roads in the country are blocked by orange barrels, we'll only have to work on Wednesdays!!"

Absolute Silence.

A voice from the back of the room asks, "You mean, EVERY Wednesday?"

 

[nismoz33]

Gotta love Kroger...I had to do the same thing to be a cashier in high school. What a joke!